dunno what title to put

too tired ... wish so much i can take one whole month leave by staying at home and doing nothing ... yet, knowing after a month holiday, i will not be able to catch up with my other teammates ... said i'm kiasu or what-so-ever (must learn how to don't bother what other ppl say or think about me)... i'm a bit kiasu , yet i'm also a lazy bum person ... i don't do things just because i have to ... i prefer to do thing when i want to (depending on my mood). I can be so damn hardworking at one period of time, yet i always find opportunity to snake :P.

i have this colleague (super senior ... boss level... his name is J***) ...i must learn how to be like him ... he's very steady when handling things. even there's big issue, he can be so calm to handle it. he also don't bother other ppl things if it's not related to his