sotong's COMPLAIN corner

new phase of life

2009-01-16T20:41:00.004+08:00

I haven't been blogging for VERY LONG TIME!!!!
Have been busy with my marriage planning (last year) and rushing for deadline (my job!!)
I was reading www.tanchunwei.blogspot.com that suddenly trigger my mood to write.
Nowadays, I'm busy (again) rushing for deadline; and adjusting and getting used to married life which I must admit **********************************************************
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(censored)
... everyone said is just another phase of life and I'll be able to get used to it soon (those are their thoughts and experiences ... they are not and have not been living my kinda life)

Never set expectation

2008-09-15T10:54:00.003+08:00

I hate being cheated. I always believe that people should not take advantage of someone's easy-going attitude. However, I'm SO WRONG.

I can only learn not to have any expectation, then, no matter how sucks the result is, I won't feel a thing as I don't have expectation. Previously, I learn not to set high expectation, but this is not working coz I will not accept any thing below my expectation. I also used to learn to expect for the worst outcome which is not good coz I always look at everything negatively.

Sigh ... the real world is so cruel.

On the bright side ...
1) I enjoy dressing up and photo shooting experience
2) Will always bargain and talk the terms and condition up front whenever it has to do with money
3) I save more money to do other things that I'll be happier instead of wasting it on something that will ended up in closet :P
4) I know I do look MORE gorgeous with makeup (coz I am, in actual fact, gorgeous without makeup ... muakakakaka)

One good thing about me is that, I always know how to find reason / excuses to make me feel better.

2008-01-15T12:52:00.000+08:00

malu to tell ppl i'm in IT line coz i don't really alot of IT things that ppl thot i shld know :P
like this blogspot .. shld be able to come out with fancy tools like video, some background things, etc, but i hardly mau explore how to come out with it ... so, if you are getting bored reading my blog ... I HARDLY CARE :P .. just wanna type down (tak mau write coz since i'll be in front of the notebook most of the time, might as well type it) something ...

after a year plus having the N73, i just started to explore net to get some cute theme for my hp. I have a cute mickey mouse dressing in oriental style as the theme and some other animal as the icons in my hp. must try to get some CNY songs too and a Choy San Yeh theme for my dad too .. he too, just recently get a N73

talk back about my work ... my speed in catching up with the new things is really really SLOW ... i think my boss also start to realise this too ... gosh ... there goes my performance ... and i just love to argue with my teammates during discussion .. hmmmm .. just voicing out my opinion-mah ...

hehehe ... i can talk many different topic in this blog

i was reading another blog and she talks about hitz fm morning show ... it was about this guy who suspects that his gf's best friend (a guy) is interested at his gf but his gf doens't believe him .. so, JJ and Rudy called up this gal and after some talking .. this gal called up her best frens-loh ... all this conversation is being aired ... and, talk talk talk .. the gal ask her best fren, "what if i break up wtih my bf, would you be my bf" ... her best fren actually say yes and that he will always sayang her .... moral of the story is :
NOT don't ever have a best guy fren .. IS don't ever call up the radio station to discuss your personal thing ... how stupid it is to actually let everyone know about this thing .. you can inform ppl in general that we should be aware of our gfs' best guy fren but never tell whole world about this ...hmmm ... i don't really have best guy fren but i do have guy frens that i can talk about anything (not til tooo personal-lah .. coz those very personal, i'll talk to my gfs)

i am getting old ... getting malas to even sms ppl to wish happy new year ... worst .. malas to reply sms too ...

chronology from bday til new year

2008-01-04T13:01:00.000+08:00

It's been 3 months plus since i blog ...

Birthday Event:
I've just celebrated my bday last weekend (30th to be exact :P) ...so happy that i have my close friends and colleagues and ex-colleague too ... if i have had the party earlier (as in 2 years back), i bet the number of ppl showing up might be more than 11 (but with tooo many ppl around, i hardly know how to make sure everyone is enjoying unless they know how to mingle around by themselves). Anyhow, I'm just glad i still have friends who wouldn't mind showing up to have fun with me :D. Anyone insterested to look at picture of me being drunk and my cake that my bb bought it and that ended up melted, can goto www.engheegoh.blogspot.com . :P

After Birthday event:
Whole day sleeping on the bed .... sigh ... felt wasted only ... later at nite, go back home to have dinner with family and then went to CK's place to yamcha and look at my birthday pictures (yuck .. i do look awful in some of those pictures)

New Year's Eve (not sure with the apostrophe or not)
Didn't actually wasted my whole day on bed though my head still banging and my whole body wanted to laze on bed ... I think i'm well trained to go shopping with kid :P .. i bring the 3 year old gal to shop at JJ (1U) to get some promotion things (2 MILO, 2 Nescafe, 2 Peanut Butter biscuits, 3 maggi mee); Watson to get RM1 hand soap refill pack (8 packets of it) ; meet my colleague to get her timesheet; tapao McD for my bro; tapao 31st Baskin Robbin!!; goto public bank (but left earlier coz there were too many ppl and the 3 year old seems tooo tired liow) and I'm doing all this things all by myself. Okok, maybe there are some super mom out there who thinks those are just minor things. To me, to bring that 3 year old out who are so mischievous and will ask to go toilet every one hour and to be able to do all those things in one short ... ... I'M VERY PROUD OF MYSELF :D. Then, reach home, finally, i can really get some short nap. Moreover, it was so hot outside that i don't even think of going out another round (to Carrefour) to get the drinks that my mom claim it's cheap. Then, after an hour nap, 4pm, i rush out to Mayfair becoz it's the last day of the promotion (and my cousin didn't even remind me of this .. aduh). And ... i actually sign up for it liow-loh .. 20 sessions, each session having 4 treatments, for rm1300. i almost wanted to sign up for another rm1300!!! but then, come to think of it, i just wanna shed of some stubborn area, and then start going for some lite exercise. Then, rush back to JJ (Kepong) to get ice-creams (rm4 per box only!!) for my cousins. Then, back to my home again. Then ... hehhheheh ... being late to fetch my colleague to dinner at puchong pulak. Ended up 8.15-8.30pm reach Puchong (when we're supposed to be there at 7.30pm). After dinner, headed back to my bf place to shower and then rush to kepong again to find my grandma. HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Then, back to my place, ended up watching 30min of the "Tak tak tei" drama. Then, planning to go to Tesco (next to The Curve) to yamcha with bf's frens manatau the traffic was as congested as those trying to come out from that area. So, giveup, go back puchong to sleep early.

New Year
We went Tesco, Giant, and checking the price for bed and mattress (few shops .. ). By the time i reach my home, i'm toooo tired to even go out to JJ (Kepong) again with my mom.

Soon will be CNY ... i just love to shop for CNY especially helping mom to buy foods and drinks ... last year, i was at JKT and when i'm back KL, 3-4 days later will be CNY and i don't really get to enjoy the excitement of shopping for CNY with my parents and grandma. This year, I will fully utilise my weekend to shop with them.

Work wise ... progress is so slow ... productivity is so low ... i really hope is the holiday season that is causing me this.

i realised i have 2 new skills

2007-09-24T11:24:00.000+08:00

last weekend was a great cameron trip wtih my bf's buddies and their wives ...

frankly speaking, earlier on, i was so frustrated to prepare all the foods for the steamboat. The main reason for my frustration is because i had to trouble my mom to help me since i don't have enough time to clean it. i only manage to clean 25% of it and then i had to rush work. My mood swing was very very teruk last week ... my AV should contribute half of my moodiness too!!! . but then, thinking i'm the only one who doesn't need to reach office on time and can buy from wet market that is so near my home, i volunteered to prepare it. heheheh ... just like my bf predicted ... i will always ended up buying more than needed :P ... ie, bad in estimating the quantity of foods to cook ... At the end ... the steamboat is a success ... the gals doing their part to prepare it while the guys, also help a bit-loh except for mr cow who has been veyr helpful (i think is because he enjoys cooking wtih his gf around :P). Overall, the trip is wonderful ... it's a good trip to bring everyone closer together.

and i realised i have some skills in guessing ie
1) i know who cooks well when i see the person working at kitchen
2) i know what is goin on using my hearing capability only

and .. i just wanna tell my another friend (garfield's wife) that ... eventhough she may think she's not expert in kitchen, but one think i find her good is that she's very good in planning her financial. at least better than me ... i always spend habis whatever i earn .. she will plan ahead and i believe that she even plan for her hubby too. conclusion is no1 is perfect ... even if one can have 100% look yet 0% heart...mr monkey once said that "we are here to learn how to perfectly love an imperfect person" ... i just wanna correct it that, sometimes, imperfect person tends to fool our love perfectly.

kekekekeke

can master 2 at 1 time?

2007-09-21T18:25:00.000+08:00

there's difference between learning to swim by yourself and having a trainer to guide you!!

i happen to have the opportunity working along with some SENIORS and they input me alot of business knowledge. it's never easy to get this knowledge by ourselves. ok-lah, probably, i'm idiot in finding the information thru internet ... anyhow, if i could just have more of this opportunity, i am very sure i'll fully understand things that i'm doing and how to handle future problem that needs a throughly business knowledge. and ... after meeting, i realised that there are ppl back in the office, busy building some tools that at the end, i'll be one of them to use it. i wish to be part of the ppl who build it than using it. but then, if i'm part of them, then i'll shall never fully grab the business knowledge of the thing that i'm doing now. for me, it's never easy to master both business and technical at the same time. and, i must admit, i'm not supergal who can do both things at the same time. nevermind, i still think i'm supergal to overcome whatever shity situation i'm in :P

the one who laugh last will have the last laugh

2007-08-19T09:45:00.000+08:00

i may be naive with the politics issue but one thing that i hate to hear the most is the unfair policies that seems to be giving advantages to one side of the races. i hope those ppl who came out with the policies and approved it, will be awake soon coz all i know is, when the situation gets tough, ppl will learn to adapt to the ever changing situation and thus it's those who "were thought not going to benefit" will benefit the most at the end. sigh ... i hope one of the them will stand out and fight for equality coz if ppl who are different color stand out to fight, will ended up in BIG trouble ... they, on the other hand, normally will get minimal penalty.

and because of this theory that i come out with, i wish to relate to my working policies ... no matter how fucking sickening the working condition may turn out, i always try to think at the bright side (THAT IS AFTER I COMPLAIN KAU LAT KAU LAT ... kekekeke) ..i grow stronger after each sickening situation ... (HAHAHAH ... I CAN BULLSHIT ALOT BUT MOST OF THE TIME, I'M LIKE THE "THEORY TALKER" but MINIMAL "PRACTICALIZE" it)

i'm here at jkt for 10days and i can spent habis my per diem each day just to buy things ... keng chau!!! my ex roommate is so right that buying so many cheap things ended up costly liow!!! ngak apa ngak apa ... as long i'm happy and the ppl that ask me to buy is happy ... no wonder-lah, the lady who read my fate said that i won't be poor and don't have trouble in financial but i will never able to save up ... THAT IS SO DAMN TRUE ...

sigh ... can't online liow coz need to let my junior use this pc later ... so funny ... the id and password to surf net belongs to me but i can't use it ... nvm ... what to do ... gue bukan orang di project ni dong ... moreover, tak-kan 10days tak online, i will mati-meh ... let my junior use it-loh ... the id belongs to them liow

my first blog after i'm working at KL

2007-07-20T14:36:00.000+08:00

no matters if i'm working overseas or back in KL, i still have lots of things to complain about ...

first and foremost, i really need to apologize to those whom i've scolded, cursed and sworn in my blog .... hmmmmm ... i know, i know, that this is not a good way to release my angriness. I AM trying hard to cool down within myself and not verbally. Not bad coz i have not been busy making phone calls ever since i'm working at KL now, as i used to call up friends to complain when i'm angry.

i know, i know that you guyz will ask me to think whether i can stabbed at someone and apologize later ... obviously cannot but, my point is, if u guyz REALLY TRUELY know me, i'm the type who don't have the heart to say bad things. Meaning, my mouth can be so "dirty" but i don't mean it in my heart. It just my habit of releasing my anger verbally.

seems that i forgotten what i wanna complain so far.

anyhow, i enjoy being at KL. after work, i'll have a home-cook dinner prepared. i can call up my bf anytime to chat. i can call up my friends anytime to chat. i can meet my old friends to do some catching up. i can bring my grandma anywhere she likes. i can play with melinda (the baby gal that my mom babysit) anytime. i can eat so many delicious foods (cheaper than jkt). i can do SO MANY things that i enjoy.

but i won't forget my juniors at my previous project. they are helpless over there. even have to use my own pocket money to call them to help, i won't mind. even knowing that what i told them to do will caused me ended up working there again, i also won't mind. i'm not trying to be heroin. i'm just giving a helping hand. you may say that i'm pampering them and not helping them to grow. but ... sometimes, u just need a hint, and you can proceed with your work.

another complain

2007-06-02T23:38:00.001+08:00

frustrated!!!

well .. this is another of my complain blog ...

gosh ... i must name this as laypeng's complain corner ... yeah .. i shld do so ... will try later

when ppl need my help ... i'll be there ... when it's not my business, i'll just be there (u know, in case maybe my expertise and knowledge will be needed) ... yet, guess what ... those ppl at KL just sleep soundly / rest peacefully without care about my concerns ... i'm really so fucking fed up ... i just sms u guyz at 10.40pm for a simple question, yet there no reply...here i am, sick and trying to finish my work yet no1 bother ... fuck off all ... that's y, ALWAYS BE INDEPENDENT AND RESOURCEFUL AND DON'T HOPE FOR HELP FROM OTHERS!!! that's the lesson i've learnt (and always knew), just that, this time, i miss calculated something and i'm left with nothing i can do to finish my work..thus, my dear colleageus (my boss said my gm loves ppl who don't complain non-sense-wor), not that i don't want to voice out anything (coz i will find solution myself, no matter how hard it is) just that since i've experienced working at KL and now at JKT, i've learnt that IT'S POINTLESS TO VOICE OUT.

at the end ... i can't blame anyone .. blame myself for not being independent and resourceful enough (even sick, also need to work ... sigh ....) ... i hate this working world ... too full of selfish ppl and ppl who only know how to talk big and ppl who are so fake.

friendship definition

2007-06-02T20:16:00.000+08:00

how you define friendship??

do you need to meet everyday??
do you need to call each other every now and then??

it's weird. i've seen right in front of my eyes that you thought you know this person well and you treat the person as friend yet just because you seldom keep in touch (the way that this person wish to .. i dunno .. maybe need to meet each other all the time?? :P ) and this person treats you like stranger .... it's more complicated than love relationship ... i'm happy that i still have a bunch of friends whom i don't normally meet nor call and yet we can still be friends. am i lucky or what??? they even understand my situation when i explained to them y i can't meet them for gathering/wedding dinner. love them so much for being understanding.

dunno what title to put

2007-06-01T11:11:00.000+08:00

too tired ... wish so much i can take one whole month leave by staying at home and doing nothing ... yet, knowing after a month holiday, i will not be able to catch up with my other teammates ... said i'm kiasu or what-so-ever (must learn how to don't bother what other ppl say or think about me)... i'm a bit kiasu , yet i'm also a lazy bum person ... i don't do things just because i have to ... i prefer to do thing when i want to (depending on my mood). I can be so damn hardworking at one period of time, yet i always find opportunity to snake :P.

i have this colleague (super senior ... boss level... his name is J***) ...i must learn how to be like him ... he's very steady when handling things. even there's big issue, he can be so calm to handle it. he also don't bother other ppl things if it's not related to his

what the fuck

2007-05-11T11:10:00.001+08:00

what's the point being commited and responsible to your job when you don't have anyone at higher level or same level to back up you?? here, i am worry that my module will be in big trouble if i'm not around and thus i changed (i bought the air asia ticket first, and then claim company) my flight ticket back to msia (and thus, i have caused alot of changes in my family and bf shcedule too). there, my backup doens't want to come early to backup me!! and this is not the first time this is happening. if you are able to give me a valid and good reason for not being able to make it, ok, i'll accept it. NOPE, you don't have any reasons and the only reason you tell me is that my junior SHOULD be able to support for that 5days alone. i really don't understand. shouldn't you be here to help prepare things or at least check all the preparation coz the cutover date is just a week away only. my junior is only one year experience. if there's anything goes wrong, i really doubt my boss will telan everything. he'll taichi to me and junior so that he'll always be the best.

even worst is that, you have always been thinking of their welfare and try to backup them when they are in trouble but they are actually taking advantage of your silliness ... wtf ... one day, i will burst out. i'm in the position that i have no1 that i can complain to such that some1 will take action. aggravation has done me no good (to my emotion and health). i just want to get out from my working life and don't wanna care bout those ppl. they are so fake. they can treat me so good and phraise me jsut to take advantage of me!!! and please ... whoever wants to comment that this if working life, BETTER DON'T COMMENT. i had enough of life theory. and, i'm not the quiet type of person. those who have been having a good life by doing bad things, i will make sure other ppl are aware of this. say i'm evil or what-so-ever. i just felt that the god give me mouth and voice for me to voice out things that are wrong.

what the fuck

2007-05-11T11:10:00.000+08:00

to express one gal's feeling

2007-04-10T23:39:00.000+08:00

she had to learn how to swim in this wide open sea
struggle all by herslef and alone
she yelled for help to no avail
had to make use of whatever survival skills
if drown, she will die
if float and swimed to the land, she should be happy that she survive
she should feel proud
coz she have learned all the swimming method
yet ... unfair is that other person get rewarded and honoured
the so-called trainer will be phraised
you're the trainer yet always try to "snake"
only think of your own sake
always talk big and not talking sense
just sitting there waiting for others status report
worst is that ... SHE CAN'T VOICE OUT

equality and fairness

2007-03-30T00:04:00.000+08:00

who said that travelling is good??
who said that travelling can earn alot??
who said that travelling is fun??

FUCK OFF those ppl who have this kind of this kind of thinking. Another unrelated to above statements but had triggered my anger is that i've seen tooo many unfairness happening around me. i will curse and swear those ppl who have been bias and mistreated to certain ppl!!! i am not the person who can just keep quiet ... believe me ... i will voice out my opinion and thoughts when there's a chance.

woosah woosah woosah woosah woosah woosah

"fan tai sui" for SNAKE

2007-02-27T22:38:00.000+08:00

i'm still not satisfied with my CNY ... wish so much i was at malaysia the 2-3 weeks before CNY and till the 15th CNY!!! else, i wouldn't be so rush for the few days stay at Malaysia ... what-to-do ... job come first (else ... sure kena blacklisted or i will doom to lose my job!!!) ... overall, i've spent equal time with my family (plus my uncles' family), my bf, all my close friends, some of my colleagues (tooo bad ... didn't meet gogo, osiruz, mp and 3 of my sixth form friends) ...

this year ... for those who are born in the year of SNAKE, it's not a good year .. the chinese call it "fan tai sui" ... mom told me that i should stop talking bad about others and beware of words coming out from my mouth ... well, she sure knows me well ... coz i have the tendency to be straight forward person ... those who don't know me well will feel offended by my words ... guess, i'll have to learn to woosah woosah and in this way, i won't be complaining alot

a Superb Saturday

2007-02-11T12:22:00.000+08:00

My friend (Mr Gu) was here for 2 days. I don't dare to take him to those "dark" area in Jakarta ... I'm classifying those as "dark" area coz it's not in the city and it's like Chow Kit Road area (20 years back) and furthermore, i'm also not familiar with Jakarta area.

Anyhow, we did experience watching a movie that cost us RP100,000 (roughly rm40)... i've never been to the gold class at GSC, thus can't really compare. It was a very good experience and very relaxing too. AND JUDE LAW IS SO CHARMING!!!! i've been watching E-channel here at JKT and could see Jude Law on the screen so many times but it is this movie that i find him so charming .... Spent a lot on clothing too ... practically, i bought all my CNY clothing here at JKT ...

Now ... have to finish my work on Sunday ... sigh ... tooo sien to work

tong tong chiang

2007-02-08T13:43:00.000+08:00

it's now less than a week till i'm heading back to my country for CNY!!!!!!!!!!!!! can't wait!!!!!!!

i've seen some ppl who actually living under same roof but not communicating with each other. and i wonder why ... there are Ms A, Ms B, Ms C and Ms D. All four from different team. Ms D is at least 1/2 years more experience than the others. And, she's only 3/4 years elder than the others. Weird is that the others tend to ignore Ms D. Ms D seems to be able to mix around with those who are not junior level and my project consists of 70% who are junior level. Ms D has joined this project from the beginning. I, on the other hand, joined this project half way, and i usually loved to be with my ex projectmates. Which is why, i don't care much if i can/can't mix with them. During work, i'll talk about work and will mix with them. After work, i'll have my own circle of friends. Not that i never take initiative to mix ... but, when your effort doesn't pay off, no point of continuing your effort. Furthermore, juniors nowadays ain't like my old times. Anyhow, i hate the idea of making other ppl lives miserable especially if we are staying under the same roof. I always believe that what comes around, goes around. One day, those ppl who love to make other ppl lives' miserable, will learn their lesson in future. That's what i told my gal junior who so happen can't mix with my guy junior and causing the guy junior unhappy (but, a lot seems to be unable to mix with my guy junior too).

Oh ... as long as i'm still breathing ... i will always encounter so many different type of people that i might not able to mix around. I know i know ... i should ignore those who can't seem to be able to accept my attitude.

countdowning to CNY

2007-02-01T08:58:00.000+08:00

2 more weeks .. and i can go back to celebrate CNY ...

i wish i'm at KL now ... it's more like cny over there than here ... furthermore, i can experience shopping spree with my family...the pre-cny and first few days of cny is the best period of time!!! gosh ... so homesick

got to fully concentrate coz i have so many things on hand and can't finish it ALONE!! ... hmmm .. i always think that if i managed to do 3 men jobs by myself, it shows i'm very capable ... yet, some ppl will take advantage of it :(

i've been to the SLIM world before

2007-01-29T22:28:00.000+08:00

hmmmm .. tempted to put my pic here ... but, afraid some unknown ppl will look into it ...

i was browsing my pictures .. and saw one pic that was taken on year 2003, Dec .. that's my slimest moment .. i showed it to my housemates ... they toooo, can't believe i used-to-be that slim ... gosh ... my current size, can't fit into that same clothing :(

just with extra 5kg on me .. and i look so different liow ..... how on earth i can shed off this 5 kg-ar????????

working env is surrounded by complicated ppl

2007-01-26T10:11:00.000+08:00

if u r new to this project and places, ok, i don't mind if u don't know about the rules and force me to take cab (even though i was at the lobby earlier than you and i was in the list for that driver) ... however, you are repeating for the second and third day... i'm not the person who will just keep quiet ... i'll be sure comment bout this coz why should i be taking cab if i'm there earlier than you .. some ppl are just not that smart enough to know that they are affecting other ppl's lives!!! even worst is that, they have some seniors who are also not smart enough to comment them!! those seniors also don't care about it and knowing that me and some others will take cab ... nia seng ...

shit ... i think my monthly auntie is coming soon ... else how to explain my bad temper!!!

then ... my another guy junior ... sigh ... i think i have to teach him the word RESPECT ... and also TEAMSPIRIT ... what's the point of me giving out the task if he's not even responding to it ... i'm going to have a little chat with him this weekend in order to be able to work together. he seems prefer to finish my boss task than my task (my boss gave him 3 days after my task and my boss not aware that i've given him some task) ... obviously, this is what i call Mr Bodek!!! ... and i hate this kind of ppl ... me and my another gal are busy supporting users, whereas, he's just doing some easy task (ok ... maybe to my standard, it's easy) and worst is that he has time to chat with other ppl on google and also talk about non-work related (eg, insurance) ... if i have to depend on him to backup me if i'm not around, i must really admit that i can't and afraid to do so and which is why, i'm so scared to be sick coz i can't depend on him to backup me!!!

sickening situation

2007-01-16T22:52:00.000+08:00

sick sick sick

sien sien sien

i hate so much to be sick ... especially when i'm about to go back Msia ... it's really wasting my time and energy !!!!!

i think it's like virus spreading the sickness .. everyone seems to be sick .. either coughing / flu / sore throat / everything ... like bird flu symptom!!!!

if i don't feel good esok, i'll just MC even i haven't see a doc to get a medical leave cert!!! .. i've worked every single day (except sunday) since i start sick last Fri!! ...

love really is blind

2007-01-12T08:50:00.000+08:00

almost every month also sick ... either is the working env or the surrounding env itself ... ate alot of veges and varieties also didn't help much ...

i'm just curious why guys (or people in general) will go after another human being who is good looking in appearance?? the appearance really matters alot ... i have 2 lady colleagues who is so happy going and fun to be with (just like me when i was at younger days .. kekekekekek) yet i have to say, not many people can see their beauty. another lady, who, alot people felt that she's gorgeous ... hmmmmm ... attitude wise, i know she's good .. i'm just commenting on the appearance ... just because with some simple make up and wear pro office wear and being very ladylike, and she manages to catch alot of attention ... how come guys are so blind??? can't they see the other 2 who have natural beauty????? kekekekekke ... i'm very confident i have that ... muakakakkakaka ...

people like me and that 2 ladies ... will not experience the love at first sight ... but, i believe they'll find their true love among their friends who eventually will become their soulmate .. love at first sight, no longer works ... love someone based on appearance, won't last long coz it's a lust ...

i have to rush my work again ... trying to finish my work and some testing before i'm goin for lunch and then cabut back to aprt coz i don't think i can tahan till end of day (with my current sick condition) ... not that i'm pretending to be hardworking ... just that, there are a lot of work and i've predicted my another junior is absent (due to sick tooo .. and my prediction really turns out true coz he actually called up to say he's on medical leave) and my another junior herself can't do so many thing at one time and so happen, i've studied that portion before ... thus, no matter how hard, come as early as possible to finish it ...
yet ... i'm writing this blog ... kekekkeke .. okok ... better start my work ...

reschedule cutover and WHOLE FAMILY have to reschedule things

2007-01-06T17:52:00.000+08:00

one thing i hate the most about traveling is that we can't plan our schedule ... we are SLAVE to the project timeline!!!

i really don't mind working like a shit throughout weekends (well .. a smart project management with smart project timeline, then i will not have to work like shit ... kekekkekek .. indirectly i'm saying that i'm a smart worker :P ) ... just that i'm not at malaysia, i have to plan ahead of all my things so that i will use wisely that few days (VERY VERY very short moment) at malaysia .. just because of some bad lousy management plan, the cutover date need to be reschedule ... and guess what, ALL MY SCHEDULE THAT INVOLVES WHOEVER IN IT HAVE TO RESCHEDULE ... wow ... and, i'm even more piss off because that date is still not firm ... omg .. it's January and cutover suppose to be in 2 months time but no1 can confirm the date ... i've plan my things 3 months ahead!!! and i have to reshedule things ....

so fucking hate my current state of situation

one manager was telling me that i'm a fierce women ... muakakkakakakaka

well ... that manager ain't know me yet ...

2 double 0 7

2007-01-02T14:50:00.000+08:00

shit-loh ... i'm reaching the figure 3 liow ... :((

i can still remember that i was still new to the project begining of the year, then it was CNY time, then i work like a shit for one month (still remember first time cry while working in a local project ... and the cause is that i'm being used to do things that wasn't my responsibility and being left all alone to figure all the things out ... and at that point, i realised that i don't need anyone to help coz i'm born to be superwoman ... muakakakkakaka ... okok ... actually, i just need my phone to call for help), then holiday at Bangkok, then work like shit for 2 months, then came the news that make me feel as if nobody aware of my job scope and my good work (heartbroken and disappointed), then came the opportunity to do different things and i realised that .NET is not hard to understand (kekekekeke .. actually, it's easier for me to understand and modify an existing system than to do things from scratch), then came the opportunity to step out from what i've been doing all this while and to do a TOTAL new module, then the rest is history

in appraisal, i was asked about objectives ... gosh ... i mean ... i don't set objectives coz things happen suddenly ... my understanding of "objective" is that, you set if u know what's goin to happen and u want to set some rules/guidance to have your desire end result ... but, i was suddenly told to HELP OUT in one project and wasn't given a job scope .. and, you are telling me that at this kind of situation, i must set some objectives????

now ... being in a new team .. with new job scope ... still not setting objectives coz my mind now is just thinking to get back to malaysia ... i know i know .. we must set objectives for our job ... but ... my mind is only thinking to get back to malaysia and it's this thought that has been keeping me on to work like shit over here ... and, thinking back, as I expected, i do learn more here than back in KL ... not to say work in KL won't learn anything, just that the system has stable and is at supporting stage ... whereas here, it's the whole SDLC thing ...

anyhow ... my new year resolution (I NEVER HAVE ANY RESOLUTION) would be : -
1) try to save as much as possible ie not to simply buy things

2) find a new job that i DON'T need to travel and get to enjoy my weekends peacefully OR remain same company but with different job scope such that i will travel less (as in 1 - 2 months coz there's no such thing as NO traveling at all).

3) get myself the "suntikan rubela" (don't know how to write in english for this)

4) a trip to Taiwan coz i wanna try the foods there

5) a new car by end of next year that is after my brother found a stable job ... if possible, maybe honda jazz, yet i really like suzuki swift but heard some comment that swift smaller than jazz. anyhow, will look for the one that i can drive my grandma to genting coz currently, my bf's car is not in good condition to drive to genting.

6) take my grandma to melaka again ... this time, will book a hotel coz it's troublesome to leave her with relatives who is staying at apartment with no lift!!

7) treat my family (if i have enough money for that month, i will include my uncles' family too) to LobsterMan (http://www.lobsterman.com.my)

8) learn to think throughly before commenting coz i've experienced a number of time that i always regret with my comments

9) try to lose 5kg so that i'll look gorgeous year end :D ... kekekekkeke ...

finally ... (NOT FINALLY)

2006-12-18T09:01:00.000+08:00

finally ... i've been waiting few weeks and it's my time back to my Msia!!!! Yet, it's not the FINAL trip back to project site ... sigh ... i will just hold on ...

it's funny ... when i was junior, i seldom questions my seniors if they are goin back to msia frequently or they get to have long holidays @ msia or they get special treatment ... yet .. juniors nowadays, they don't seem to agree if seniors/PM/teamlead get to have more priviledge than them ... juniors nowadays, have their own perspective ... probably, having TOOO MANY juniors at one time not a good culture coz all tends to group among themselves and to generate their own thinking according to their likings. If some seniors get to mix with them and not telling them the truth & logic and keep pointing the bad of the teamleads/PMs ... there goes this young juniors ... their mind has been "corrupted"!!!

Next trip back, i foresee i'll have to work every single weekends. It's has been a routine that i'll wake up early (even during weekends) to prepare my breakfast & lunch (what to do ... there ain't much good food to eat around my working area and it's damn hot outside too). If it's weekend, i'll be goin to supermarket (early @ around 9.30am) to grab all ingrediants to cook during weekends and weekdays. After supermarket, will goto office. But, i try not to over exhaust myself. I will cook when my body can wake up early to cook :D.

i realised that a lot programmers don't really know how to write and speak proper english ... but, i salute those (who don't really know how to converse well in english) who dares to write and speak ... even myself, english educated, still making a lot of grammar mistakes in my writing ... must brush up!!!

woosah woosah woosah again

2006-12-16T12:05:00.000+08:00

i'm so damn angry!!!!

and i'm making sure whole office know i'm so damn fucking angry!!!! ...

i can't believe it ... the whole projectmates can just left me to take cab even after i've told them that to wait for me!!!! .. all because there's a miscommunication between one person and another person and that those ppl don't even thought of calling me (reason is ... tak tau my number and wanted to save money!!!!) to check if i'm goin with them!!! and ... weird is that i've written my name in the list that is working at 10am!!!

so fucking angry!!! ... and i know my temper has caused ppl around me scared of me ... dun k ... i'm angry and it's not my fault ... i can't help myself to show my angryness!!!!

i've been always a good projectmates and never selfish too .. when there's a car ... even those ppl ask me to keep a place for them, i'll be sure to keep a place for them ...

ok ... my time to woosah woosah ... must cool down coz i've been spending money to call ppl to release my tulaness .. and also been wasting my time to cool down that i have not been tracing program!!!

40% increament si boh

2006-12-11T14:07:00.000+08:00

hahahahahha muakakakkakakakakka

the civil servants asking for a 40% increase in their salary because the reason is that their productivity level has improved and the stated example is that passports can now be ready within 2 hours. That's such a lame excuse!!! Passports can be done within 2 hours is because they cut down all the red-tapes and less processing time ... not because they increased their productivity. ... like this, we ppl at private section also can seek for 40% increase-loh ...

anyhow, i agreed that they said they haven't get any increament since 1992.

THE CLEAR MOON SITE

2006-12-11T13:44:00.000+08:00

dear Soo, i like your comment :
"Its hard to feel how one feel, we can only interpret it based on our own experience. Everywhere when you look at the moon, it looks almost the same but maybe on my side its look more clear as today morning it rains heavily hence the sky is clear. On your side the moon is shrouded by clouds hence its blur at the moment.

If you are a driver you look at the view in front of you with different perspectives compare if you are just a passenger. As the driver the view in front is possibly an obstacle to get the passenger safely back home. As for the passenger, they will look at the view as a piece of lovely landscape on their way back home slowly dozing in and out of sleep...... "

For me ... i will do whatever to make myself to see the clear moon (either i'm really at that side, or i'll just have a picture in front of me :P ). Usually, i'll just opt for that picture. My ex-gm once sent me an email stating that if one can't change the surrounding to suit us, we have to change ourselves to suit the environment. Indirectly, i'm interpreting it this way :
"If you don't like what's goin on around you, either u think of something, maybe the bright side of all the bad things, such that you'll feel better. OR, get out from the situation."

I'm the type who loves to complain and express my thoughts into word (either verbally or in writing, without thinking twice of the consequences) so that i can release whatever that are in my mind. And, most of the time, it will just gone away. However, it's just hiding some where deep and when it reach a certain of limit, it will burst out again. Maybe it's my way of control and some may disagree coz it's still "hazardous" as i'm not solving the problem at all.

One day, some day ... i'll find get myself to the side where i'll see the clear moon .......

tulan nia seng ham ka ling!!!

2006-12-07T19:50:00.000+08:00

so frustrated!!!

again ... they are testing my patience ... ppl work so hard the whole year, just to enjoy the year end celebration and CNY ... yet ... no matter how much a person sacrifice ... at the end, still can't enjoy coz customer is the priority. i only can say that i can't assure my productivity!!!

fuck ... i really must find another job in kl ... not that i don't like my company .. i totally enjoy the freedom and enjoy working with my colleagues (and also from my another company's colleagues) and i still have plenty of things to learn ... yet .... this time really testing my patience ... probably because i'm a homey person, thus, i love and enjoy being with my family and friends and love ones during the BIG day ... is that too much to ask????

not that i ask to work overseas ... my gosh .. i practically come here because there's no1 available to come here, it's a good environment to pickup skills (though .. it's so damn fucking susah to learn) ... that's all ... nothing about money at all (coz i earn that much here .. i spend that much here too)

i will ask my parent and bf for their opinion ... because i don't want to stupidly resign before i manage to find another job

just few more days ...

2006-11-15T13:19:00.000+08:00

i can't wait to go back home!!!! i have full list of things i wanna do and eat and buy.

oh ... i just realised that i don't like mixing with ppl who don't give feedback/response when i'm talking to them ... no wonder i dun feel like talking to "bittergourd" ..

"bittergourd" really "bittergourd" ...
no wonder "bittergourd" tak ada "soul"partner ...
no wonder "bittergourd" so stick to his/her geng ...
how can a normal person stands with this type of ppl ... i know i can't thus i don't bother to know this person .. in fact, in future, if that perosn needs my help, i will be sure won't help-loh .. so "bittergourd", that i think that person ada attitude problem!!! (ok-lah, mayb i can't accept this type of attitude)

bittergourd

2006-11-13T13:13:00.000+08:00

i have never seen anyone with such a "bittergourd" face!!! ... probably i never have any friends who are like this and in fact, i'm very grateful!!! So "bittergourd" that the person really pissed me off whenever i'm around that person and thus i never wanted to have lunch/dinner with that person coz it will just spoilt my mood!! And, if my level of tolerance reached the limit, i know i'll be sure confront that person (but alot stopped me from doing so) ... kekekekeke .. me and my mouth!! just can't help myself from voicing out ... but, for me, if a person, dares to voice out what they are unhappy about me, i think i would be able to accept it...Rather than having a person being so fake in front of me-loh

finally ... shifted to a new place

2006-11-11T13:03:00.000+08:00

yeahoooooo . finally i have shifted to my previous apartment!!! the place all the good memories were (actually i could only remember the x-mas + my bday party that was celebrated at that place)

however, things wasn't easy to me too .. i mean, before moving to that place, i encounter some tiny little minor problem ie my room door (at my fren's place) has been locked from inside and the keys were no where to be seen!!! i called up my friend, he himself wasn't sure if he has the key and he was busy at work too ...

so ... i have to ask around for help ... and, so happen i have another friend coming to help me moving things ... and i also managed to call up my another teammate to help. Both of them .. trying and trying .. after around an hour, finally, the door is open .. using a ring-ring card :D
lucky me!!! else ... i would have to spend $ to get it done!!! and i don't really wanna use my money on this kind of things

oh gosh ... i'm so pissed off with ppl who are so blind!!!

never mind .. sotong always have her own bunch of friends .. dun care if i will ever ended up having another good friends from this project (at the end of my working period in this project)

they are just so blind

2006-11-08T09:52:00.000+08:00

whatever goin now, really happen for a reason and, i will always remind myself
1) not to be unfriendly to ppl who just join the new project
2) not to simply boycott ppl
3) remain to be who i am now, that is, always take the initiative to get to know ppl and not waiting for ppl to know me

woosah woosah ...

disappointed by ppl that are blinded by a temporarily and faking friendliness of ppl whom i know they are just soooo fake ... sigh ... nvm ... like my bf said .. i'm there to work and to learn new things ... i won't give a fucking care of things goin around me!!!

well ... too bad to those ppl ... they miss the greatest opportunity to know this sotong ... hehehehahahahah .... just my way to think good my me :P

counting again

2006-11-07T14:00:00.000+08:00

one week gone ... oh gosh .. i have another 3 weeks to go ...

i'm planning to move back to my old apartment .. hehehe ... this time is the master bedroom .. wow .. it's veyr big .. but, tooo bad .. the condition ain't that good .. the lights are bad, the air-cond not working fine, the toilet is dark too ... nvm .. i guess this is the normal condition for a place that hasn't been cleaned for 2 weeks (maid having 2 weeks raya holiday) .. problem is that i'm not entitled for that room and waiting for permission from the management ... sigh ... what so big deal of it ... if there's a new gal coming in, just let the new gal share bed with me-loh ...

sigh ... i still haven't get to know more ppl around here ... coz, i wanna make sure that when there's a driver downstairs, they'll ask me to go back too .. instead of having me to be very very aware of my surrounding and start scanning around by 5.30pm for ppl who intend to go back ... how to do so-ar?? my back is facing them-leh .. and i'm facing a wall ... i'll be very tired to just keep scanning around!!!

okok .. i'm counting my days to go back home ... so sick of being away from my life in malaysia

hanging Saddam but what about USA president?

2006-11-06T13:24:00.000+08:00

i was reading the stars .. headline :
"Saddam to hang
A visibly shaken Saddam Hussein was found guilty of crimes against humanity Sunday and sentenced to hang at a lightning session of the US-sponsored court that has been trying him in the Iraqi capital for the past year."

and i'm wondering, how come President Bush not having the same ending?

counting days ... 3 more weeks to go

2006-11-06T13:12:00.000+08:00

when someone ask u some questions, did u ever have this thinking that the person is actually asking for his/her own benefit coz whatever my response is, will affect him/her and he/she needs to know in advance such that he/she can do some arrangement for himself/herself.

too complicated

wah .. my this trip to jkt here is unlike my last year trip ... this time, i keep counting the days!!! not that i have nothing to do .. i do have things to do and i'm taking forever to understand it!!! It's slow but i managed to finish.

Tony Romas (once a year)

2006-11-04T12:54:00.000+08:00

hmmmm ... how come when i'm overseas, i'll be sure busy blogging ...

ok .. finally, i met my previous projectmates ... hehehehe ... i'm always happy to see them ... it's like meeting old friends ... but i would have to say that we seldom keep in touch yet there's certain of bond there ...

well ... i get to know another new group of ppl yday and i terus join them to have dinner at Tony Romas (remember my previous blog ... hehehe ... i can't mix with my "own" ppl, then i'll mix with other ppl and maybe later slowly i'll be able to click with them) ... wow ... Tony Romas dong!! it's baby ribs that i'm ordering .. and, it's FINGER LICKING GOOD!!!! ... even last year when i was at JKT, i also make a point to eat at Tony Romas .. kekekeke, it's like once a year "must do" thing

later i'll be following another group of ppl to try dunno what duck thing ... i know this place is new to me and thus i must really give it a try ... moreover, one of them resigning and next Fri is last day and sure kurang "kaki" to go makan-makan liow

ok dong .. must start my work .. oh gosh .. i have to take over this whole thing and this few days i'm left all by myself .. well, it wasn't my first time supporting ... and being such a goodie good me, i know the god will treat me very good during my time of supporting (that, i will be capable to handle the situation :P )

sigh .. i wanna make phone calls to talk to my friends in malaysia and singapore ... but ... damn expensive-lah ... i must find ways to chat with them (hey, that's my style .. ie, complaining :P )

homesick and being "BOYCOTT"

2006-11-03T10:21:00.000+08:00

damn it ... so fast i'm so homesick liow ... started crying since wednesday nite ... and since then, my tears can't stop flowing .. i mean, it will just suddenly burst out and i can't control it!!! oh .. i miss my life in malaysia .. miss my family (that also includes my uncles' side), miss my bf, miss my friends, miss my bf friends, miss the baby that mom babysit (oh .. she's so adorable!!!), miss what i do every single day in malaysia, miss my mom's cooking, i just miss everything!!! and the only thing that can keep me goin is to keep thinking that i'll be able to learn more things and input more skills ... that's all .. and ... i hate it so much to sacrifice so much for an unsure future/gain that i will be able to obtain ... anyway .... last year, i'm also like this ... anyhow, as long as i'm being asked to go overseas, i will be homesick

even more homesick coz i'm not closed to this new environment ppl ... lets observe this scenario ...
i'm in taxi with my junior (module mate), and 2 other fellow project mates (from other company) ... one of senior hp number calling my hp .. i pickup, answer, actually looking for my junior .. well, ok .. coz the junior hp's wasn't on ... nvm ... but, to my surprise, the others are looking for her for dinner and i'm not invited!! ... isn't that a bit rude!!! .. oh gosh ... where's has all the manners gone-ar?? ... i remember me as a junior or in mandiri project, i will definitely ask those around me whether wanna join ... nope ... i was just totally being ignored ... FUCK ... well ... and, i have to keep woosah and thinking that, nvm ... i'm still alien to them ... BUT HELLO, i'm so talkative and friendly yet i can't be able to mix with ppl there who mostly are juniors (i have proved i'm can easily adapt to new environment when i was in maybank during the first 3 days!!)... wow. .. what's wrong with this project environment

lunch box

2006-11-01T13:03:00.002+08:00

my 2nd day here ... noticed that my whole team cook their own lunch ... unlike previously where we cook our own lunch, here, one person cook for the whole team!!!! wah .. so keng chau!!! cannot believe it ... i myself can't be doing this coz i did tried to cook for 3-4 person, and it's such a tiring task and the person who cook for that day have to wake up very early!!! today my first time tasting it .. it's spagetti ... hmmm .. not bad ... it's HOT (that's the best thing of it!!!) :P ... okok ... actually, i'm goin to start cooking my own lunch next week coz paiseh to ask ppl cook and i tak pernah cook for them :P

first nite and day at JKT

2006-10-31T17:39:00.000+08:00

i reached JKT at about 7.30pm ... BUT ... only an hour later that i managed to catch a taxi ... coz, THERE ALOT OF PPL!!! there are flights from HK, Spore, Australia, Msia ... those are teh country that i can remember ... and all flights fully occupied!!! imagine that .. all the lanes at custom having long queues!!!!

phew!! .. thank god the taxi driver know my destination location ... coz, i dunno where is this place at all .. it's not really the usual location that i've been to (not familiar only ... i know i was around this Mangga Dua area to have bubur.. that's all) ... when we reached the hotel, guess what ... there weren't any booking for me and my boss!! .. aiyo, and my boss's hp roaming wasn't activated by maxis yet (this maxis, need ppl to call them twice to confirm the activation .. pariah-lah) .. so, i have to use my roaming line to call my teammate and also the PMO gal ... and,finally, by 10pm, we have the rooms ...

ok ... room is fine ... but, abit scarry coz alot of mirrors .. i used up all the towels to close all the mirrors!!! i have the queen size bed all by myself :P (actually, not sure is king / queen) ... but, of course, being a superstitious me, i will put alot of stuff on another side of the bed ... hehehehe ...

i BRING ALOT of things!!! my luggage is full of foods .. and, another bag is just clothing ... and my laptop bag (which is very heavy itself!!!) ... yday nite, i found out my sesame oil tertuang half!!! aiyo aiyo .. it's already halved when i tapau it .. now, it's half of the half!!! ... worst is that, my another fren in this project told me that i can get that (abit expensive only) at some chinese shop at the nearby shopping complex!!! i have to spend time to wash some of the things frm my luggage!!!

the next day morning, breakfast time .... hmmmmm, probably i enjoy bread, thus i expect alot of bread selection ... BUT HOR ... disappointed coz tak banyak .. thus, i just had milk, guava drinks, 2 slices toast and 2 eggs ...

then .. i have to walk to bank-leh!! ... kns .. macam-la we both ada sense of direction-meh ... anyhow, we manage to find the bank ... and ... when we reach 5th floor ... we thought it's the working place ... SORRY .. it's NOT!! .. i have to walk staircase to 6th floor which is the penthouse!! .. and, we all cramp in this penthouse!!! ...

ok ... i have nothing to complain now (hopefully not for my whole month stay here)

same old Rain and my same old topic

2006-10-20T09:57:00.000+08:00

do u guyz know the Korean super hot dude, Rain???

hmmmm .. i'm not a big fan of him yet i'm not trying to say bad about him either ...

i've saw him performing on stage and his MTV for a few times .. and i can conclude that, he's basically dancing the way Michael Jackson dance. If that's how he got famous in the first place, it's ok. But, after so long, he still uses that kind of movement.

that's the story of same old Rain ... now my "old grandma story"...

those 5 years and above were told to write down their contribution to company. it seems that it will be used as a measurement for rewards and for the management to be aware of how far we have achieved. hmmmm .. i am not sure bout other organisation and i didn't read alot of management books. but, i do hope contribution will not be the main factor to reward a person. i know, i know, the management would prefer someone who is best in contributing even if this person has the worst attitude of all. i haven't really write down my contribution coz mine is totally contribution to myself :P .. ie, self improvement ... AND i can't add it into my cotribution list coz i was told to write what i've done and the role i've played. ... there's no other section of what are the skills that i've pick up.

hahahahhahaha ... no wonder i'm abit reluctant to write and send to my admin manager.

And, btw, what's so wrong being a follower?? i think ppl have forgotten that if everyone become a leader, where should we find the follower? :D ... logic thinking-leh ... bear in mind that, not being a leader, doens't mean that person lack of leadership. There's always some logic reason a person who has hidden ability to lead, decided to stay as follower. :P

some jealous ppl with bad mouth

2006-10-13T17:49:00.000+08:00

i miss mandiri working ppl .. at least when we bought any new gadget, no matter it's latest/not latest techno .. we all sure enjoy playing it... here, my place that i'm working now, .. there are 2 person, who has been saying nothing good since they know i have new hp .. damn tulan to hear what they say

if u just wanted to remind me that i've been cheated/i'm stupid .. ok-lah, sekali cakap udah-lah .. i can accept it ... ini bukan ... each day and every single time my phone rang, they also remind me this!!! Secondly, they even said that "wah, ur bf must be super damn rich to buy that damn expensive thing" in a very weird tone .. u know, like "mengejek" ... and another famous line "wah, you two damn senang kena tipu. i don't believe all the shops there are giving you that price." ... ... ... ... ...

i think what i don't like to hear is their way and tone of saying it out. both has atittude problem and yet, ppl around me said they both have good heart pulak ... and, the best thing is that i can predict their reaction!! see .. i'm begining to think i'm very good in judging ppl .. kekekekek

Nokia N73

2006-10-11T18:09:00.000+08:00

hehehe .. my bf bought me a nokia n73 hp as early birthday present .. i shall officially use it esok :P ... hehehe .. too happy that i can't describe my feelings into words ..

THANKS A LOT B!!!
LOVE YOU

a letter from a frightened Malaysian abroad

2006-10-10T13:51:00.000+08:00

the below passage is from an email

Dear All,

I have been meaning to pen some thoughts for some time now, to let people actually read the views of the typical 'overseas Malaysian' who is kept away. I realise that my email is rather long, but I do hope that you would consider publishing it (and also keep my name private!). I shall start by telling a little about my background. Mine is a rather sad tale - of a young Malaysian full of hope and patriotic enthusiasm, which is slowly but surely trickling away.

I am very different from many other non-bumiputeras, as I was given tremendous opportunities throughout my childhood. Born into a middle-class Chinese but English-speaking family, I grew up with all the privileges of imported books, computers, piano/violin lessons and tuition teachers. My parents insisted that I should be exposed to a multi-racial education in a national school. In my time, my urban national school (a missionary school) was a truly happy place - where the Malays, Chinese and Indian students were roughly equal in proportion. We played and laughed with each other, and studied the history of the world together during Form 4, with one interesting chapter dedicated to Islamic history. Though 75% of my teachers were Malays, I never really noticed. My Malay teachers were the kindest to me - teaching me well and offering me every possible opportunity to develop. I led the district teams for English and Bahasa Malaysia debating competitions. I was the only non-Malay finalist in the Bahasa Malaysian state-level elocution competition. My Malay teachers encouraged me to transfer to a government residential school (sekolah berasrama penuh) so as to enable me to maximise my academic potential. I refused because I was happy where I was, so they made me head prefect and nominated me as a 'Tokoh Pelajar Kebangsaan'.

Till this day, I am absolutely certain that it was the kindness of all my Malay teachers which made me a true Malaysian. I excelled at school and was offered a Singaporean government scholarship to study overseas. I turned them down because I wanted to ensure that I would remain a 'true Malaysian' in the eyes of Malaysia. So I accepted a Malaysian government scholarship to study at Oxford University. Throughout my three years as an undergraduate, the officers at the MSD looked after me very well, and was always there to offer support. I graduated with first class honours, and was offered a job with a leading investment bank. The JPA released me from my bond, so as to enable me to develop my potential. I shall always be grateful for that. I worked hard and rose in rank. My employer sent to me to Harvard University for postgraduate study and I climbed further up their meritocratic ladder. Now I am 31 years old and draw a comfortable monthly salary of US$22,000. Yet, I yearn to return home. I miss my home, my family, my friends, my Malaysian hawker food and the life in Malaysia. I have been asked many times by Singaporean government agencies to join them on very lucrative terms, but I have always refused due to my inherent patriotism.

I really want to return home. I have been told by government-linked corporations and private companies in Malaysia that at best, I would still have to take a 70% pay cut if I return to Malaysia to work. I am prepared and willing to accept that. My country has done a lot for me, so I should not complain about money. But of late, my idealistic vision of my country has really come crashing down, harder and faster than ever before.

I read about the annual fiasco involving non-bumiputera top scorers who are denied entry to critical courses at local universities and are offered forestry and fisheries instead. (My cousin scored 10A1's for SPM and yet was denied a scholarship).

I read about UMNO Youth attacking the so-called meritocracy system because there are less than 60% of Malay students in law and pharmacy, whilst conveniently keeping silent about the fact that 90% of overseas scholarship recipients are Malays and that Malays form the vast majority in courses like medicine, accountancy and engineering at local universities.

I read about the Higher Education Minister promising that non-bumiputera Malaysians will never ever step foot into UiTM.

I read about a poor Chinese teacher's daughter with 11A1's being denied a scholarship, while I know some Malay friends who scored 7A's and whose parents are millionaires being given scholarships.

I read about the brilliant Prof. K.S. Jomo, who was denied a promotion to Senior Professor (not even to Head of Department), although he was backed by references from three Nobel Prize winners. Of course, his talent is recognised by a prestigious appointment at the United Nations.

I read about UMNO Youth accusing Chinese schools of being detrimental to racial integration, while demanding that Mara Junior Science Colleges and other residential schools be kept only for Malays.

I read about the Malay newspaper editors attacking the private sector for not appointing enough Malays to senior management level, whilst insisting that the government always ensure that Malays dominate anything government-related.

I read that at our local universities, not a single Vice-Chancellor or Deputy Vice-Chancellor is non-Malay.

I read that in the government, not a single Secretary-General of any ministry is non-Malay. The same goes for all government agencies like the police, armed forces, etc.

I read about UMNO screaming for the Malay Agenda, but accusing everyone else of racism for whispering about equality.

I read about a poor Indian lady having to pay full price for a low-cost house after being dispossessed from a plantation, whilst Malay millionaires demand their 10% bumiputera discount when buying RM2 million bungalows in a gated community.

I read about my beloved national schools becoming more and more Islamic by the day, enforced by overzealous principals.

I read about my Form 4 World History (Sejarah Dunia) syllabus, which now contains only one chapter of world history, with Islamic history covering the rest of the book.

As I read all this, I tremble with fear. I love my country and long to return. I am willing to take a 70% pay cut. I am willing to face a demotion. I honestly want to contribute my expertise in complex financial services and capital markets. But really, is there a future for me, for my children and for their children? I am truly frightened.

I can deal with the lack of democracy, the lack of press freedom, the ISA, our inefficient and bureaucratic civil service, our awful manners and even a little corruption. But I cannot deal with racism in my homeland. I think this is the single biggest factor which is keeping people like myself away. And bear in mind - there are so many of us (researchers, scientists, bankers, economists, lawyers, academics, etc.). What people read about in Malaysia (like Dr Terence Gomez) is but the tiniest tip of the iceberg. You will be amazed to know about Malaysians denied JPA scholarships (which would have made them civil servants), took loans to attend Ivy League universities, but who are later asked to advise our government (on IT, economics, etc.) at fees running to millions of US dollars. Such information will never be published because it is politically incorrect.

As a Christian, I pray for God's blessing on this great country of ours. I pray that He blesses our leaders with the foresight and humanity to see that this will not work and cannot continue. I pray that they will have the strength to make our country a home for all Malaysians and that they will have mercy for the poor, including the non-Malays. I pray for true racial harmony and acceptance (not just tolerance) in Malaysia.

Yours sincerely,
A very frightened Malaysian abroad

terrified 2

2006-10-05T14:32:00.000+08:00

1)
last weekend, me & bf, watch Rob-B-Hood. Rob-B-Hood is classified at UMUM. Thus, alot of kids there too. BUT ... the cinema tengah previewing GRUDGE2 .. alamak .. so scary!! me & bf also got shocked when we were watching some of the sneak preview of GRUDGE2 ... the advertisement should be UMUM as well-loh .. else, it doesn't serves the whole purpose of categorising UMUM-loh

2)
while driving from subang to kepong ... the flyover just before the Kelana Jaya LRT station flyover ... you'll notice a very big advertisement billboard on your right .. that's GRUDGE2 advertisement ... i was driving at nite with my cousin ... that sure scared both of us!!!

TERRIFIED!!

2006-10-05T10:17:00.000+08:00

the pessimistic side of me :
- to think the day that i have to go overseas, i start to shiver and tears start coming out ... coz i feel unsafe being so long from home country which is why, i won't complaint if i didn't go to any tour .. infact, i'm not the type that enjoy exploration .. just enjoy being with family/friends during tour
- i'm scared to be at the custom at another country coz i know i'm not supposed to be there for so long ... there was once, i was ask to go into the room for questioning, but, my tears start flooding my eyes and that custom officer just let me go .. i guess, he's scared to see me cry :P .. how lucky i am that moment!!!
- i'm scared to go to a far away place for so long where i will miss my family members, bf and dearest friends ... i sure miss the daily things that i do at my home country with my family, bf and friends ... i don't get to call them whenever i feel to do so (mahal-leh)
- thinking that i have to wake up early in the morning to prepare my lunchbox, it just so tiring yet i had to coz my tastebud still prefer my home country foods (some is good .. really good .. if just have those food for once awhile is ok .. but, helo, for the whole month!!) ...
- dunno will it be like another project where i can't find teamspirit...
- i'm tired to go overseas tooo long coz my 4 days in KL/3days/2 days in KL, aint enuf at all. i have tooo MANY ACTIVITIES with family and bf and friends and pasar pagi too!! (need to buy foods to bring over there) that i find so hard to squeeze everything into 4 days only

the optimistic side of me : ... i force myself to be optimistic ... so hard to hide my pessimistic side ... yet, need to think of the good else how to survive overseas ...
- earning money for CNY ... (but, i don't really need either ... coz, i've managed to control my expenses that i manage to spend wisely and save up too)
- seeing my ex projectmates ... (but, they are different project, susah mau meet up with them and for sure there will be some gap coz we all different project .. but, i still enjoy meeting them)
- getting cheap things from overseas ... (but, i don't have enough place in luggage to bring them back also .. and buying more meaning spending more and i've manage to spend less nowadays .. thanks to my bf and mom who always remind/scold me if i spend on unnecessary things)
- getting a promotion year end coz i'm taking the responsibility ... (but, i don't wish to go overseas-loh .. i rahter the company tak promote me)

i'm the super gal!!

2006-09-28T10:19:00.000+08:00

i must be some damn superb gal!! else, how to explain why i'll be asked whether i wanna go when there's project that tak cukup orang?? another explanation to it is that ... i'm toooo goody-good!! knowing that i dun have a strong point to say NO. I'm like the fire extinguisher ... when there's a emergency, i'll be there .. but, when there's any promotion, like real life, the fire extinguisher will not be included and will be forgotten soon ... until ... there's another emergency

even worst is that ... when u step your foot in there .. u can't come out ... so sad ... so sad ... my life, all tumbling down just because some other ppl mistakes in managing ppl!! ... i have to sacrifice my life for company that doens't recognise me ... and .. those ppl whom i've helped, didn't even thank me at the end!!
1)your work and i dunno anyhting, yet i have to stay late to understand and solve your problem or at least find out the root problem so that you know how to solve the next day ...
2)your job scope and it's not my job, yet i keep getting call from other company who seek for information coz you dun wanna entertain them and i have to help out coz you dunno what i've done previously (lame excuse)
3)you are the better skills than me (company recognise you), yet you don't understand my simplest program??? (another lame excuse)
4)tricking me to into something that you know you need me to backup you when you are ask to travel/doing some job that you don't like

kns ... i dun want any increament nor phraise nor promotion anymore (afterall .. what's the point being included in the next round of promotion when i'm not included in the first round ... u know .. i'm STILL the second best thing!!) oh gosh .. i'm so damn disappointed with the current trend. the trend now is this : u die, ur pasal ... u ada problem, ur pasal ... ... Turning myself into a person that i no longer care what the heck the management will think of me. in fact, i'm reluctant to help anyone ... really .. what's the point of me doing so?? i'm only getting myself into deeper hole!! moreover, when i need help, will they care to help me?? i still remember the feeling of begging ppl for help ... it SUCKS!!

and the most important thing is that .. i NO LONGER WILL KEEP SILENCE ... i'll make sure everyone knows i'm frustrated even though i'll be causing eveyrone around me tulan ...

oh ... y wouldn't i just resign and get another job?? ... thanks to my 2 years in msia!! .. the experience i gain is mainly about knowing abit of this and abit of that ... there's no definite speciality nor expertise which other people really need!! thus, forcing me to go back to my main root to gain more skills coz other company doesn't want me to be in their company to learn new skills as normal developer even i have lower down my salary!! and, i can't even spend extra time to do my own studies coz i've been busy working as fire extinguisher and almost burn-out!! all the hardwork, causing me to rest EVEN MORE when i have the time.

the beauty of writing

2006-09-27T12:28:00.000+08:00

i was reading 2 of my friends' blog ... hmmmm .. like "monkey" said, "cow" has come to the point of expressing feeling/thought into writing whereby it's full of "maksud tersirat" and not anyone can understand ... :P

wish i could do so too ... then, i'll be able to talk bad of someone in writing without worrying anyone understand what i'm writing .. muakakakaka .. so bad of me ... can only thought of this ... hehhehehehe

that's y ... to be a great philosopher, one should start talking and writing in the sense that nobody will understand the key point... hehehehehe

DOWN down ... up UP UP

2006-09-19T11:50:00.000+08:00

omg ... i'm easily getting pessimistic nowadays ... where have all my happy-go-lucky attitude gone? why i'm no longer easy-going gal? why i'm no longer having the "take it easy" attitude? why i've been thinking & analyzing a lot? why do i complain alot? why do i so easily get irritated?

when little things ain't goin the way i want OR
when unfairness happen around me OR
when i've given so much but no1 knows but myself

i'll get upset and keep complaining. That's what i do .. complain to forget bout the unhappy things. I really must forget and ignore. It's not really doing me any good. That's it!! Let me regain my energy by stepping back.

Lets enjoy some of the Sun Tzu's Art of War ... we really can implement these in real life

There are five essentials for victory:

(1) He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.

(2) He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.

(3) He will win whose army is animated by the same spirit throughout all its ranks.

(4) He will win who, prepared himself, waits to take the enemy unprepared.

(5) He will win who has military capacity and is not interfered with by the sovereign.

Hence the saying:

If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.

By discovering the enemy's dispositions and remaining invisible ourselves, we can keep our forces concentrated, while the enemy's must be divided.

Move not unless you see an advantage; use not your troops unless there is something to be gained; fight not unless the position is critical. If it is to your advantage, make a forward move; if not, stay where you are. Anger may in time change to gladness; vexation may be succeeded by content.

I'll pamper myself this evening with delicious cheese cake :D

Oh .. the title of my blog .. it's actually means that i'm feeling down down down .. but, i will soon feel energetic again

wedding dinner is profitable?

2006-09-15T10:56:00.000+08:00

wedding wedding wedding

i've received alot wedding invititation .. some from my close friends and some from NOT SO CLOSED ppl (see .. i'm using the word,ppl and not friends ... unless we have been in the same project for those colleagues or u r my school friends .. school = college/secondary/primary). I'm really funny coz i did ask a colleague to invite me to his wedding coz i wanna meet my previous project-mates (like a gathering). kekekekeke

The first question in your mind is who should u invite? But would you invite the whole world knowing that they won't attend and the venue wasn't big enough either!! My gosh, like a tactic to profit from this event. Or maybe that person really too happy and excited and that he just wanna share his happiness. Only god knows. Anyhow, i sincerely wishing them a blissful marriage and i'm not attending :P

but for me, i'll be sure inviting those who have invited me to their wedding last time ... so sorry bout that coz knowing that we weren't that close now (after long time of not contacting) yet i have to invite you :P ... (u know, like chinese saying .. "ada datang, ada pergi")

d BEST of what one can do

2006-09-08T16:10:00.000+08:00

Motivational speaker Art Linkletter's quote:

Do a little more than you're paid to do;

Give a little more than you have to;

Try a little harder than you want to;

Aim a little higher than you think possible;

And give lots of thanks to God for health, family and friends.

I wanna add "Expect a little less than you hope to get." :P (the higher your expectation, the more you felt the disappointment)

are we really a democratic country?

2006-08-30T09:37:00.000+08:00

tomorrow is a big event ... our 49th years of independence
1st Sept is the budget announcement day

and ... i can't help to think that it's another stupid protocal that will turn bumiputras becoming more and more lazy to strive!! Reason is that they know they will get paid without having to work hard, they'll get a job without having trouble to find one. Which is good to those non-bumiputras ... it's part of surviving skills ie, when you know it's getting hard to earn money, you'll tend to strive even more and to find whatever ways to earn more money in order to survive in this unfairness situation. The very good example, like the quota to enter local university. Non-bumiputras have to work very very hard to get a place there. If they are unlucky or getting course that they don't prefer, and if they are wealthy or lucky enough to get sponsorship, they'll be studying overseas and at the end contribute their expertise and knowledge in that foreign country. What a waste to our own country and that has to blame the stupid quota!! I hope the government will realised that the more they helped bumiputras, the more they'll create hatred and which will divide the people and harmony will slowly disappear!!

Same goes to everyone of us in a working environment. When you're not recognised in your company, these are the people who tend to strive quietly. Well, depending to that person characteristic. I know there are people who rather surrender thier future to the company and didn't want to take any action to make themselves recognisable. Sometimes, unfairness happens everyday. There are people who are lousy in people skills (to name a few, not working as a team with other people and not being helpful to solve problem coz thinking that their program is not having problem and that the other party should look into it!! ... that ain't the proper way of working ... should work together then the problem easily solved!!) and yet, they are recognised for being good in other thing and these are the people who are put into test to become leader ... well ... just part & parcel of working life ...

woosah woosah woosah ... and i have to work and strive to be recognised by company (not by other people or other company ... that's a DAMN BIG mistake .. coz they won't help you to inform your company that you are good) .. however, it won't change my attitude to work closely with people ... i like my working attitude and i enjoy working with people especially knowing you have helped them to solve problem even though my hardwork is not seen by my own previous bossES. Then again, it's just timing matter. It's not my time yet ... and so, i'll make good use of this period of time to "input" more knowledge & skills. (coz ... i'm still a lazy bum :P)

wedding of the century

2006-08-29T10:06:00.000+08:00

i understand y she married a man who is 20+ years older than her and had a very lavish wedding...
1) he's a man who is equally rich as her and thus won't be aiming at her money
(but ... he may ended up bangkrupt and all her money will goes to his-leh!!)

2) he's a man who only has a not more than 30years of flirting...once he's 60+, think he tak ada energy to flirt-lah
(but ... he can still marry 2-3 other wives and she has to bear with it)

3) it was broadcast in the tv for all her fans out there who wasn't invited
(but .... this is the first time the whole nation have to watch her wedding ... really, lebih from the agong nor sultan's children's wedding!!)

what i dun understand is that
1) he's nobody at all ...none of us ever heard of his name. he's just a small cooperate player and yet super rich pulak .. wah ... must be ada udang sebalik batu for being low profile (u know ... like the gangster world ... they are rich and super powerful and yet they live in teh dark)

2) he's once married with 4 children (though he insist he divorced before chasing her ... yet, somehow, she may be the main reason for the divorce!!!)

3) and ... everytime and everything during that wedding nite, is her name comes first ... u know, like forgetting the hubby ... for eg, the emcee also mention her name first before her hubby name .. the cake, have her name first then followed by her hubby name ... all singer who went on stage also wish her first then followed by hubby ... the whole nite tv presenter talking bout what are her wishes for that wedding nite and rarely mentioned the hubby ... it's like, the wedding is for her and not for both of them??!! ain't that a bit disrespect?

4) y invite our ex PM and also DPM-huh?? hmmmm .. i thought we normally invite ppl who are related to us. I think it's the trend of the well-known ppl's wedding ie must have some VIP in the guest list

Not that we are bad but like year 2003, Erra & Yusri also wedding of the year ... ended up, divorced 3 years later ... what a bad ending!!

always keep track of expenses!!

2006-08-28T10:30:00.000+08:00

i think must be the god trying to hint me that i MUST START KEEPING TRACK OF MY "IN OUT" MONEY (no idea call what ... something like GL) .. else, no matter how much i earn also will gone :(( ...

It was a releaxing sunday and suddenly come to my mind that i should have amount X & Y in my bank a/c (3 years ago) but i have no idea where they went. I tried to trace back and recall all my transaction, yet not coming to any conclusion too. Tonite, i have to check my another drawer for all my bank statement .. if i still have them with me :( . What i hate the most is the fact that the amount is not small amount!!! :(( :(( :(( :(( :((

no time for colleagues

2006-08-21T01:29:00.000+08:00

hmmm ... i think i've blog this story before ... about me not having enough time.

I saw my colleagues all having time to go out with my other colleagues on trip/any outings!! And, i'm wondering how come i'm not invited!! (hehehe ... that's not really what i'm complaining) ... Nah ... i don't really have time for them either. I guess staying with family and being a local really makes a difference. And, obviously, i'm the type that must spend time with family and close friends (of course my bf too and his friends) and some time for rest.

And, i didn't blog this in my friendster's blog coz i don't wanna create any misunderstanding among my colleagues.

My Life Rate ... try this game

2006-08-16T17:53:00.000+08:00

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	6.7
Mind:	5.6
Body:	7.3
Spirit:	5.9
Friends/Family:	5.6
Love:	6.9
Finance:	5.5
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

BLOCKED BLOG

2006-06-26T17:41:00.000+08:00

Lay Peng wish to announce that she has to temporarily bloging at friendster due to the blocking for blogspot by the stupid KWSP network ppl!

Please have a look at the picture below that was captured by Lay Peng.

HOWEVER, she can still access to other blog to read (but, with lots of error on page message in the blog). She'll continue bloging at blogspot when she has the opportunity to do so. For the time being (if there's no latest blog at blogspot), please go to the link My Blog . The design of this new blog is almost the same as the original at blogspot.

GT Race

2006-06-25T23:50:00.000+08:00

James, my bf's buddy, managed to get some free tickets for us to enjoy the GT Race at Sepang today.

wahlau ... the GT Queens really "syok" to watch at!! with their beautiful skins, looks, voluptous body, flirting characteristic :P .... ok, i must confessed, i'm not interested in the cars at all as i'm idiot in cars terms. But, when hearing the "vrooom" sound from the GT cars engine ... wow .. it sure is exciting!! (needless to say that it is also tearing my ear drum!!)

some of the pics
(i'll post some of it esok coz i have a hard time to connect to streamyx)

ASTRO new package (MY IDEA)

2006-06-16T11:26:00.000+08:00

nowadays, everything also comes in package of u pay for the period of service that you want. For eg, i buy a certain amount of pre-paid card phone and i get to call/sms for that amount of money. I pay rm44 for 88 hours of streamyx connection. Thus, i was wondering whether ASTRO have this kind of package. If they don't have, i really HIGHLY recommend them to have this. There are certain people who only watch ASTRO at nite. They will think it's a waste of money to pay that amount and they only watch it at NITE. How come ASTRO doesn't come with the package of u pay rmXX for XXhours of viewing. Isnt' that good!!!

my name on d magazine

2006-06-05T21:35:00.000+08:00

Look at this Spotlite magazine ... my name Peng Peng is there :P

MASSIVE JAM AT LDP - sequel

2006-06-05T21:20:00.000+08:00

ok, there's no story from The Star newspaper ... and, my friend manage to find the news from here ... check out this link (for those who understand Chinese) .... kns ... i don't understand, and my parents tired to look at my screen to read it pulak ... now, i'm depending on my bf to translate for me ...
http://www.sinchew.com.my/content.phtml?sec=1&artid=200606051038

ok .. i found the eng version ... (my kepoh chi forced me to find the eng version :P)
http://www.nst.com.my/Current_News/nst/Monday/Frontpage/20060605074609/Article/index_html

MASSIVE JAM AT LDP (AFTER MIDNITE)!!

2006-06-05T01:19:00.000+08:00

MASSIVE JAM AT LDP!!
i bypass the place where its underneath is the junction between mutiara damansara and kampung penchala (the junction whcih we can use to go to Mutiara Damansara or 3min after bypass 1U) at around 0020. And then, there're 3 stretch of long queue ie TRAFFIC JAM!!

by the time i'm 8 cars from the Touch&go counter in front of me, it's already 0058 and i dun think in 2 min i can reach the touch&go counter coz there're lots of car from my right and left tryign to squeeze in to my line ... and moreover, i can see, those car, after pass TOL still queuing ... so, i decided to u-turn before reaching the tol .. trying my best to turn right ... wind down my window, use my hand to signal car drivers that i wanna turn right ...

so happen, ALL the car on my right wanted to turn right at the same time ... but this also took me few minutes to turn-leh. Moreover, that stupid u-turn is a temp u-turn & small size .. even for a perdana, that car driver also have to turn in and out many times and with the help of the tol man to supervise the turning. Me not bad ... all by myself and terus go thru (but slowly turn-lah) .. actually, the tol man, one glance at my car, he look at another side after it ... proobably because mine is not a porch car, so, tak mau hirau me-kua.

ok, finally u-turn successfully, i drive at more than 100km/h (as long as my car is stil stable, i'll continue to press my fuel!!) to reach Sri Hartamas. Then from there, go to Segambut. Then turn to Kepong. This is also a risky way coz what if all the massive jam at LDP was caused by the stupid MRR2 repair work, then Segambut also will be the same thing.

ALAS ..... reach my housing area at 0118 .... thinking of this, the stupid LDP should put a message on the digital board to hint us to use other route-lah!! then, i shld be able to reach home before 0040-lah. But then, i didn't go straight home. I purposely goto LDP again to check if the other side of the road is stil bumper to bumper ...

KNS ... TAK ADA pulak ... but can see there are alot of cars and the numbers are like during weekday at around 9pm (not too busy road but not quiet road) ... since esok is working day for some, i didn't expect at this hour, there're alot of cars around-loh.

i was cursing and swearing ... then i realised, even if i still continue queuing at the tol ... i dun think by 0105 i'll be able to pass the touch&go counter. so ... start to cool down and write this blog. Mayb there was a massive accident after the tol ... dunno-lah ... i'll read newspaper esok and trying to hear if there's any news bout what's goin tonite!!

btw, y i can stil remember my time ... coz i was looking at my clock ALL THE TIME!! N, my clock is 10min faster than actual standard time :P

conversation between 2 "after - spm" student

2006-06-03T16:53:00.000+08:00

i was in KTM(yday morning ... supposed to write this yday but the stupid blog keep disconnect when i halfway finish my blog) .. in front of me there was a boy & a gal (just 6" in front of me ... very near) ... born to be natural kepoh-chi me, of course start listening to their conversation ... both, i think they took SPM exam last year and now studying at some college. i can't really remember the exact conversation but i know the main points. They were already talking half way, and below is part of their conversation (In cantonese .. i translate to english + malay)

Girl : How come study (not sure is foundation/certs/what-so-ever ). Why not terus studying (not sure is diploma/degree)
Boy : I don't have enough credits-mah
Girl : Wah ... what do u mean by not enough ... how much u need-ar?
Boy : At least 5 credits and i only have less than that
Girl : How bad did u did during your exam? I told my mom that "Mom, i'll pass everything except Ad-maths". (i thot ... ok, she seems a bright student type of face ... must have scored in other subject ... continue the conversation for more shock!)
Boy : i failed physic, ad-maths,..u-leh? (he's taking science subject ... coz he was mentioning his sains class has straight As during their earlier conversation)
Girl : i have P7 for accounts, sejarah, .. (i can't remember what subjects ... only know that she didn't mentioned she scores anything .. and she must be taking half arts and half science)
Girl : i don't want to take form6 coz it's .... (dunno the reason as i wasn't really paying attention to it) .. taking diploma with combination of Econs & A/Cs (wah ... P7 in a/c also take a/c .. okok ... very confident!!) hoping to get degree soon.

then ... i wasn't listening, was looking at the traffic at Jln Kuching ... missed their conversation which come to this ...
Girl : Dunno how much the company offer me. They didn't stated the salary. Mayb small company. I want to work in Big company, more benefits-mah. Small company, only socso & epf and mayb pay half of ur medical fees.

My god ... that kind of result ... i would have take initiative to change my subject during the early stage of Form4-lah ... buat apa continue science subject when i failed most of it??!!! And, i really admire their guts to admit that they failed certain subject. And, failed so many subject, still has the will & dream to work in big company ... i didn't say it's not good ... i'm just "pui fook" them

gold DIGGER

2006-05-30T22:31:00.000+08:00

the evil part of me envy that certain ppl know how to dig money yet ... i really pity them too ... (my own theory .. heheheh)
since they r actually a gold digger,meaning that they are wearing a mask all this while. Trying to lure the perfect person to be their life partner. And when found the right person, ooooo ... "tunjuk belang". But then, what is even worst is that the lovely couple only has the two of them in their own world and ignoring the rest of the world (talking bout inconsideration)....hmmmm ... love is so blind .. i do admit it ... i've been thru it ... but, i always keep telling me that, if my close friends ever warn me about my partner or i'm doing something wrong, i must choose to, at least, listen to them. 'pong kun jeh ching' ...hey, what's friends are for ... they are there to remind us things that we forgotten :P

anyhow ... i'm just an outsider ... i dunno much about the real story behind. everyone has their own right to choose their life partner. but, must love a person sincerely and not being selfish to think of their own future (ie, getting a rich person will ensure good life in future) ... i always tell myself, the hard earned money is more meaningful than easy money (that is by cheating) ... anyhow, it doesn't apply to me!! ... for me .. if i can save money, that's MIRACLE ... muakakakaka

(talking is easier than applying in real life)

WHO AM I

2006-05-30T14:27:00.000+08:00

i was at taking Putra LRT from Masjid Jamek. I manage to squeeze in. But, i do queue up and not like certain people who just come from no where and squeeze in. Though i didn't voice out but my eyes keep staring at the malay guy. WHO AM I to voice out when the man in front of me also ignore it!! I know if i'm that man in front of me, i'll sure voice out asking him to queue up (politely).

In the LRT, i saw a mid 40 indian uncle, left hand holding few books (i think they are like 4 yellow pages books!! but those are photostated paper-lah), right hand holding on the holder (trying to stand properly!!). In front of that uncle, there were 2 young chinese guy who are sitting comfortably. I was so tempted to ask the chinese guy to help that uncle yet, again, WHO AM I to complain when that uncle himself is not complaining. i know i will help the uncle-loh.

I've been like this since i started to take KTM to go back home. I hate ppl who is so ignorant and not helping other ppl. I hate ppl who lean against the "tiang" and i can't even hold that "tiang" so that i can stand properly. Thus, i'll just voice out. Nothing wrong with this kind of attitude. i'm just trying to avoid small "accident" ... who knows .. the train suddenly stop and i step on some1 feet-leh / i accidently push some pregnant lady-leh

we aren't friendly nation

2006-05-30T14:06:00.000+08:00

i always heard the stories of how fellow local ppl will bring those outstation ppl to places of interest ... like my bunch of colleagues in Bangkok, the locals there took them to places to shop and many other interesting places. I have another friend who is now in Venice, was invited by his colleague to join his colleague's friends visiting Slovenia for a short trip (http://tanchunwei.blogspot.com/) .

Hmmmm ... i wonder whether places with chinese, malays and indians will be as friendly as those people? I know i won't be that friendly. I seldom go out shopping too. I don't even know what is the place of interest in malaysia (not even KL area!) . I only go out to meet friends/movies/lunch with family members.

My own project, there are people from Thailand and Indians. I'm not sure if my fellow colleagues did invite them to any party/gathering occasion/special outing jsut like how the guy from Thailand used to invite my other fellow colleagues when they were working at Bkk.

y must follow hubby?

2006-05-26T16:35:00.000+08:00

after the last trip from my bf's hometown ... i had this one question in my mind.

if i were to marry him, i would like to see that we can celebrate CNY at each other place on alternate year basis. Meaning that one year at my place and another year at my bf's place. .... hmmm .. what so big deal with this idea??

this is 20th century ... things and people's mind has eveloped .. i only know that in the old days, married women must follow their hubby coz hubby is the breadwinner-mah.

In my whole life, i've been celebrating every single BIG celebration with my family and friends around me. Instead of me following my future hubby every year, why don't we share our happy moment together? i too wanna let my future hubby experience my way of celebrating it.

OK, i'm prepared that some1 will comment that .. might as well we don't have to have wedding dinner. Well, if both parties parent agree, y not. Even some will comment that do not need to register at all ... THAT is impossible-loh. Coz, either party will not get any benefit if either one of them encounter some bad thing. And, if my information gathered is correct, when a baby is born, to register the baby birthcert, need a marriage certification-mah ... well .. i'm not sure

May 20th = Fei's bday

2006-05-26T15:27:00.001+08:00

it was my bf birthday last sat ... hmmm .. kinda took me quite a long time to blog this .. hehehe ... i didn't even post any pictures here (not really my type of posting any pictures too :P)

well .. we had steamboat ... hmmm .. the stupid soup turns out ugly (by look) but taste not bad (after few rounds of ingredients into it :D ). i was thinking to come out with clear soup (with corns too) with some herbs taste but i bought the wrong herbs and the soup turns out brown in color!! anyhow ... at the end, it tasted just fine :D

i think we bought alot of ingredients and couldn't finish it .. sigh ... have to telan everything ourselves (me & bf). If can (and if i'm capable of ... that is, if i have enuf time to practice cooking), i would like to prepare an western way of dinner / chinese type of dinner in future. Western ... coz i like the idea of starter, main course and appetizer and cheesy stuff and can enjoy red wine. Chinese ... coz i'm chinese and i would like to come out with dishes like the restaurant taste. Anyhow, i hope i have a maid to clean up the kitchen ... i enjoy cooking but i hate cleaning :P

a LOST acquaintance

2006-05-19T01:08:00.000+08:00

she's my ex-colleague who always dress differently (almost every single day!) and fashionable to work. She's really good in mixing and matching her dresses! I saw her at KTM last week and we had a short conversation and short laugh (talking bad bout some1 that we both know :D ). I even chat with her at yahoo messenger regarding my tulaness in my project.

Then, Monday, there was news that she was diagnosed as having colon cancer on Sat. I'm so shocked to hear this!! Even shocking news was that the cancer cell had spread to other part of her body. Meaning that it wasn't the initial stage of this tumour. She only felt pain when there was sudden swell on her stomach on that Sat. She was admited to ICU for operation. I heard that the operation to remove the tumour from her colon was a success. She was awake but she couldn't move nor talk. She was on the bed but she can hear clearly to other ppl converstaion. Since the cancer cell has spread to other part, she is still not in stable condition.

Just now, few of my colleagues were at the hospital to visit her. I sms them to ask her condition. They said she's not opening her eyes and lying weak on the bed (but stil alive). That sms from them is at 10.25pm (they left the hospital). Then at 11pm, my hp ringing. Saw my colleague number on my hp screen. Immeadiately i dun feel good and have a feeling she's goin to send me some bad news.

YUP ... .... .... she's crying while announcing the death of our dear ex-colleague. i'm wordless at that moment as it never cross my mind i shall never see her. Frankly speaking, i'm not closed to her as like my other colleague to her. But, i know her as we are in the same company and same project since this year. I did talk to her before. We do joke & laugh together before. We did have lunch & dinner together before.

I shall remember her (licia is her nickname she used in our project LAN chat) as the gal who always dress differently to work (and so far, she's the only colleague i know who dress that way)

FAKE remark

2006-05-17T16:39:00.000+08:00

have u ever received this kind of remark?

"wah .. if u r not around, dunno what will happen to ur team and UAT and SIT env"

"wah ... will u be in your company for long? i can't imagine this project without u"

"laypeng .. u r the best-lah .. know all the things before i remind u"

"u have done a wonderful job since this UAT starts ... if not for u, i dunno who i can look for"

i don't feel proud when i received this kind of remark. in fact, i'm quiet pissed off coz i felt as if those ppl are taking advantage of me. which is y, i start to "tunjuk belang" i.e. reached office late (well, before 9.30am-lah but after 9am), curi-curi pulang early without informing those ppl in charge (well, normally i'll ask if there's anything pending else i'll cabut first), take longer time to check data (i can checked it very fast but rather do it slowly)

Think Positive!!

2006-05-17T16:36:00.000+08:00

some1 send me this :

Finding positive out of every negative - which we don'talways manage to do. I am thankful...

1. For the husband who snores all night, because he is at home asleep with me and not with someone else.

2. For my teenage daughter who is complaining about doing dishes, because that means she is at home & not on the streets.

3. For the taxes that I pay because it means that I am employed.

4. For the mess to clean after a party because it means that I have been surrounded by friends.

5. For the clothes that fit a little too snug because it means I have enough to eat.

6. For my shadow that watches me work because it means I am out in thesunshine.

7. For a floor that needs mopping, and windows that need cleaning because it means I have a home.

8. For all the complaining I hear about the government because it means that we have freedom of speech.

9. For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot because it means I am capable of walking and that I have been blessed with transportation.

10. For the noise I have to bear from my neighbours because it means that I can hear.

11. For the pile of laundry and ironing because it means I have clothes to wear.

12. For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day because it means I have been capable of working hard.

13. For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours because it means that I am still alive.

Where SUCCESS goes to?

2006-05-17T16:30:00.000+08:00

Success does not necessarily go to the person who has the most elaborate plan. Success goes to the person who takes a plan and puts it into action.

Success does not usually go to the person who can take a few noisy, impressive strides. Success goes more often to the person who steadily puts one foot in front of the other.

Success doesn't automatically go to the person who starts out with the most resources. Success goes to the person who makes the best use of whatever is available.

Success goes not to the person who makes the biggest promises. Success goes to the person who reliably follows through on promises.

Today is your opportunity to put your plans into action. Today is filled with moments in which you can put one foot in front of the other and move steadily forward.

Today you have the chance to follow through on the things you have promised, and to make the most of the good things that are available to you. Use today wisely, and success is yours.

-- Ralph Marston

superiors' appraisal

2006-05-05T13:11:00.000+08:00

i think we shld have the policy that the superiors have to be reviewed by their fellow subordinates in order to review their increament. Else, i don't think the higher level ppl will know what exactly goin on in a project managed by the superiors. Who knows, the superiors aren't really doing anything and it was the subordinates coordinating among themselves. If this is what higher level ppl refer to as management skills .. then FUCK OFF-lah ... the subordinates have the management skills more than the superiors!

lecturer among S.I.T team

2006-05-03T17:25:00.000+08:00

it's training session for this project ... wah ... can't believe those S.I.T team consists of ppl who has lecturing background!! ... i was setting up uat env and can hear them teaching the users. Wah ... 3 of them really teach very well!! they keep the audience awake all the time and the audience really ask "meaningful" question.

saya tak faham bahasa inggeris

2006-05-03T00:05:00.000+08:00

i was in the kommuter this morning ... as usual .. ALOT ppl in it.

there was a young indian lady standing with her whole body leaning agaist the metal "tiang". A chinese uncle was standing nearby that "tiang" but he can't hold the "tiang" and he was trying so hard not to fall and not to bump to other ppl's body. Til he stand it and ask the indian lady politely whether the indian lady can stand properly so that he can hold that "tiang".

The indian lady replied "Saya tak faham bahasa inggeris"

The uncle angrily replied "Kamu bukan tak faham bahasa inggeris. Kalau tak, macam mana kamu tahu saya sedang cakap bahasa inggeris. Kenapa tak kata saya cakap bahasa lain? Saya ajar kamu-lah, lain kali jangan cakap dan bisu saja-lah. Sekarang, boleh tak kamu berdiri baik-baik sebab saya nak pegang tiang ini!"

The indian lady very angrily stares at the uncle .. but, she left very quick after that.

STUPID SCHOOL ASSIGNMENT (PART 2)

2006-05-02T23:54:00.000+08:00

another cousin of mine (who is the elder sister of the prev Part 1 story) was told to collect stamps and this will be one of the syllabus study material (forgotten ask my cousin whcih subject was this assignment for).

well .. not any normal stamps ... the teacher wants stamps with 6 different fruits picture on it!!!

there aren't any post office nearby my cousin home (not really within walking distance-loh). thus, need my uncle to spend his precious lunch time to go to post office to get the stamps for his daughter. my uncle's bahasa melayu really limited-loh. probably he doesn't know how to ask fromt he counter and thus he didn't manage to get any.

ok, if he really manage to get any ... fruits picture stamps will not be as cheap as the normal stamps-loh ... there goes my uncle's lunch meal

another assignment which i don't understand how and what my cousin will learn

hmmmm .. probably the teacher is a stamp collector ..

i'll ask for the follow-up stories from my cousin when i visit her family during the weekends.

STUPID SCHOOL ASSIGNMENT (PART 1)

2006-05-02T23:33:00.000+08:00

one cousin of mine (youngest) was told to come out with a "book" (dunno call what ... all i know is like our proposal type) ... regarding his family biodata.

So, he used some of our family photograph, elaborate on the photos, wrote details of each family member (to the extend of their hobby, occupation, etc). Then, the papers were binded with a very nice colored paper as the main page with title on it. My cousin comes from a poor family and they don't have a computer ( i did gave my very old pc ... the version before P1 ... and dunno how they use it, within a month, i cannot boot the cpu and monitor also rosak). My cousin also the "lazy" and "slow learner" type who has never use a computer before! I wouldn't want to waste my money to buy them a computer-loh. I believe, those staying at rural area manage to learn using a computer. It's really his attitude i.e. showing no interest in studies.

That's y, he writes instead of printed it out. When he passed up his assignment ... aiyo ... his teacher said the writing "senget" .. return the whole thing to my cousin and ask for a re-do!!!

STUPID-ar!! the papers and binding already seem to have cost my uncle alot money (hmmmm ... that money is enuf for my uncle one lunch meal). The teacher didn't even thought of the consequences of asking my cousin to re-do the whole thing!! Even if my cousin wanted to print out the assignment .. that lagi worst!! will cost my uncle few times of lunch meal-leh!!

I know the reason for the teacher to take this kind of action (to instill some kind of good value in my cousin such that he'll put in more effort in future assignment-mah). But, thinking that it already has cost my uncle's few lunch meal, i really believe there should be a better way to teach my cousin. Long time ago, when the computer era hasn't rule our country, ppl also writes their assignment-lah.

N, i also dunno what will my cousin learn from this assignment? The family ties-ar? What is has to do with the studies? I dun really know the syllabus taught in school nowadays liow. Y wanna waste money on the photos? Might as well ask my cousin to come up with an essay and diagram to show the relationship-lah.

"interested to meet Married Men"

2006-04-24T09:58:00.000+08:00

some lady ... purposely put in their profile saying that they are interested to meet Relationship Men, Married Men ....

2 thinking:
1) I would think they are CHEAPOS & BITCH. Lonely lady who is seeking for short term and none commitment type of relationship. Who knows .. probably looking for one nite stand!!

2) Safe as in they wouldn't get involved in any relationship with these guys coz these guys udah berpunya.

However, it can be guys fault too. If the guy love his gf and respect his gf, he wouldn't get himself involve in another relationship while having a gf.

LOVE is something so complex!
LADY is so complex human being!

Probably i think tooo much

PHOBIA

2006-04-20T11:26:00.000+08:00

I'm at my new project site since year 2006 (and consider as short period compare to my other teammates) and i'm developing some kind of phobia towards my working environment!!! I'm not looking forward to working at that place every morning. In fact, whenever my hp ring, i sure go nuts!! Coz it's phone call regarding my work.

My productivity is totally affected ... i no longer can concentrate at all ...

buat JAHAT dibalas JAHAT

2006-04-10T14:54:00.000+08:00

my bf houseleader is a TOTAL JERK!! hmmmm .. even the wife also not really good coz can't advice her man to be good!! ...

can't really give tooo mcuh details on this bad guy ... only know he's a prudential agent, with the surname NG BOON XXX, driving a toyota vios with plat number W dunno what (shit ... i written his number somewhere and i malas nak get it .. will publish his plat number later :P). Oh .. UPM Terengganu student (but .. should be very OLD batch :P) .. computer science-wor ...

well .. i remember long time ago, i did write about this houseleader who got angry with my bf because my bf park his car inside the house. Hmmmm .. how come we can't live in a harmony environment?? Not that my bf wanted to park his car all day long!!! We thought both of the car went out station, so, my bf just park his car in the house car porch. Since this incident, the houseleader and my bf not really like each other liow.

Well, it's the houseleader revenge time!!

He's moving out in May. WOW, my bf so happy that he's moving out!! But, no1 in the house wanted to take the responsibility as the new houseleader coz the houseleader stil owe some huge amount of electric bills. So, the houseleader talk to the landlord. But the conclusion never make known to my bf! Well, the conclusion was that all of them has to move out by end of April. And my bf only knew this at the beginning of April and the houseleader told him after my bf paid for the April rent!! While others already knew that since March.

No point for my bf to argue or to ask compensation coz the reality is that he stil has to move out. He told the landlord too .. but landlord can't do anything since the new group of ppl that will be moving in soon had sign agreement. i myself really had the idea of scratching his new car, put some sharp thing underneath his tyre, add some sharp thing to his washing machine!! .. see, so EVIL i am ... but ... nope .. i never do so coz i dun want in future the god punish me that i'll have some bad neighbour .... but ... HHAHAHAHHA ... this morning, some1 scratch the houseleader new car!!! hahaha ...

but ... so bad of him .. to have thought it's my bf. Meaning, he must have some outside enemy!! It shows how bad he is!! Even ppl living with him also can't stand his attitude. The wife also pariah .. can't condemn her hubby attitude .. mayb both is meant for each other!!

My personal opinion, that houseleader is a grown man. Living with some strangers in the same house, meaning we have to tolerate. As insurance agent, i believe he should knows how to deal with ppl. But i guess, he only knows how to get business and i doubt his a professional insurance agent and i doubt he has conscience.

I believe for what ever bad things that we have done, there'll be bad "balasan" (dunno the english for this)

bad luck & MORE BLUE BLACK

2006-04-10T14:19:00.000+08:00

i had a bad luck week!!!!!

first .. which happen last thursday ... i fell down the staircase which is only 3 steps ... hurt my knee, ankle and the "small thigh" part (ie the bone between my knee and ankle ... dun really know the term for this body part) ... and, this is the 2nd time i hurt at the same place within 2 weeks time!!!

second ... last sat ,... accident pulak ... the accident involved 5 cars and my bf car was in the middle ... ai ... what a hufe bang!! the impact was enormous that the passengger in the car behind me fainted and need to send to hospital ... me & bf, both have certain area on our body parts turning blue black now, neck feeling stiff (can't really turn left/right during the time of accident!!) ... we went for x-ray the next day (coz the nite of accident, the doc insisted that we both don't need to get x-eay-wor) ...

now .. my leg (BOTH LEG!!), stomach (small part), back (small part) ... ai ... turning blue black liow ... look so horrible!!!

my sis ... also not getting any better too ... last fri, her boss suddenly annnounced a decrease in salary for everyone in teh company ... my sis's salary has been decreased the most i.e. 25%!!! she sure is very angry at the boss ... bad planning from the boss and the employees have to suffer!! sis is looking for job now .. anyone knows whcih company at kepong/PJ (PJ whcih is nearer to BU side) who wants to hire admin clerk?? please inform me ...

my bf ... hmmm ... dunno a good news or not ... moving to a new place ... the story is in another post (above) ... hmmm .. dunno will i be charged for publishing this kind of story!!

BITCH & JERK

2006-04-02T22:07:00.000+08:00

i've been hearing stories of ladies who are single and alone working in KL City, damn weird than any ladies whom i know. Criteria to be in this category ppl (that also include those not singles lady or man):
1) don't have CLOSE friend whom u r comfortable to talk to

2) don't have activity eg yamcha with friends, girls outing, etc (or dun enjoy doing those)

3) when there's problem that need guys help (this refer to the ladies), you'll look for your guys colleagues/ex and rarely acknowledge the guys' gf existence (that is so rude!!)

4) when ladies approach you (this refer to the men), you'll be SO DAMN GENTLEMEN to help them that you forgotten that you have a gf whom u need to attend to!!even worst is that those ladies didn't even acknowledge the guy's gf existence ... for eg, i will actually ask my fren whether he needs to call his gf to explain the reason of being late / i will directly call the fren's gf (normally, if i know that gal-lah :P) that i need her bf help

5) ppl who are scared of being alone ... for eg: when you are alone and you don't have things to do, u really have no idea what to do (meaning, not activity which u love/enjoy doing my urself .. for eg, mayb can try playing pc games/reading) and u start to feel lonely and u dun have close relative whom u can talk to (at least phone to chit chat... like me, i can call my cousins to chat too)

beware of this ppl ... ok, different ppl different attitude-mah ... but, they are certainly a bunch of weirdoes. Especially if they are ladies .. chances that they might be looking for one nite stand .. or they enjoy stealing ppl's bf ... so, watch out for ur bf whom is easily fall prey for them!! If they are guys ... hmmm .. watch out too .. chances that they might be tengah "main kayu tiga" too ...

well .. i'm not talking bout me coz i have full confidence of my bf :D ... i'm refering to stories that i heard from

my bangkok trip

2006-04-02T21:45:00.000+08:00

i just came back from bangkok + pattaya trip last week ... there were 10 of us (include me and bf) ... the trip is enjoyable, not because of the place, but because i'm goin there with a bunch of friends ... OK, probably due the fact that i'm following tour, thus didn't really went to any interesting places. My bf stil uploading the pic .. later will broadcast the link.

oh my god ... first nite at bkk, on the way to china town .. we were in 3 taxi (since there are 10 + 2 who join our tour too goin there) .. the taxi that i'm in, was stopping due to the red light, i was sitting behind on the left side, looking at this car which look like "kereta keranda" ... was about to inform my friends to look at this car when suddenly my friend shouted out asking alll of us to look at the driver seat of that car!!!! Y?? ... OMG!!! there was this gal doing blow job!! hmmmmm ... i know i never saw this kind of scene in malaysia-loh ....

another thing that i really find it different from msia is that ... THERE ARE LOTS of 7-11!!! ... just mainly one short street, there can be 3 shops of 7-11!!! good thing also coz we can get mineral water easily :D

the road condition is better than us ... well, at least, i noticed the road looks shining as if it was wax!!! (is this good or not?? .. i dun really know .. but, really "KILAT")

the taxi is better than us ... i hardly saw any bad condition taxi on the road-loh

the taxi fare cheaper than us though the petrol price is higher than us

the electricity wiring looks dangerously!!! (i did capture this picture)

at the end ... i'm not saying it's bad .. but, it like a good place to know bout A to Z of sex

Jekyll & Hyde

2006-03-20T13:30:00.000+08:00

http://thestar.com.my/lifestyle/story.asp?file=/2006/3/19/lifefocus/13524366&sec=lifefocus

ATITUDE-wor

2006-03-13T23:50:00.000+08:00

certain ppl with atttiude that they'll take action to avoid the same mistake/bad thing happen to them. For eg, if the working situation is not what u desire, and u have a dream to pursuit ... instead of asking/demanding for higher paid/better working env/fair treatment, he/she will just resign and pursuit the dream. hmmmmm ... total respect to this type of ppl but the other partner might not be able to complain bout their daily problem repeatedly

There's another type of ppl with almost teh same attitude as above .. take action to change the env .... hmmmmm ... dunno how to explain .. but, the reason that i've heard from is not "strong".
Like my bf said, every where we go, will deal teh same scenario. If can't survive here, how to survive outside? Another reason is bout $$ ... One thing i've learnt .. never ask for more when you never contribute more (shld apply this to our gov ... never ask for more price hiking when the public transportation was never improved!!).

certain ppl with attitude that they'll be very protective over themselves to avoid being dwelt into more and more responsibility/headache (coz need to think for solutions). For eg, if he/she has been assigned with job A, don't expect he/she will entertain your question with more and more answer/or explore other possibilities as it's beyond the job A function. hmmmmm ... good to protect oneself ... bad to other person who has to ask question/ask these type of ppl to work on some better solution as one question is given one straight answer (when in fact, there's a chain reaction that need to deal with!!!)

certain ppl who has the burning desire to lead/manage ppl at the very "inexperience" age ... hmmmmm, good to have big dream ... bad that, if you don't know how to construct your sentence and will turn out like an order/the way a master ordering ppl to work!! to lead/manage, need another skills called "social"/"PR"/ppl skills. If you keep wanting to win over your leader/seniors, that's not a good man. Knowing how to be humble is the best.

Too bad ... reality proven that one needs to "hard sell" oneself and even lie in order to get the job.

.... i'm the only consumer who don't like ppl keep hard sell the product verbally in front of me!! making me feel like i'm a "water fish". If i want to have that product, i'll ask for your information.

At the end ... i have no idea what i've written ... like a total mess ... heheheheh

reading blog, attracting ppl

2006-03-02T19:35:00.000+08:00

wow ... I HAVE NOT READ ANY OF MY FRIENDS BLOG FOR SO MANY MONTHS!!!

i was reading my bf's blog ... smiling at the screen
(this time .. the guy sitting on my right opposite, start to glance at me with a funny face)
i was reading my ex-boss blog ... i start "wah .. ooo ... wow .."
(that guy .. he smile at me liow .. coz i'm damn weird looking at the screen)
i was reading PD Gal's blog .. i start to laugh out "Hahaheheh"
(that guy ... using LAN chat asking me .. what's so funny??)

okok .. to be continue when i have time ...
i'm been so lazy to update my blog

some of my favourite song

2005-11-17T14:35:00.000+08:00

Lets guess what's the title songs for these lyrics:

Lyrics 1
Didn't hear your wicked words every day
and you used to be so sweet
I heard you say
That my love was an addiction
When we cling our love is strong
When you go you're gone forever
You string along
You string along

Lyrics 2 (2 person singing, thus i'm putting 2 paragraphs here)
Looking in your eyes I see a paradise
This world that I found is too good to be true
Standing here beside you, want so much to give you
This love in my heart that I'm feeling for you

Let 'em say we're crazy, I don't care 'bout that
Put your hand in my hand baby, don't ever look back
Let the world around us just fall apart
Baby, we can make it if we're heart to heart

I was driving when these 2 songs playing on the radio in the morning. hehehehe .. I like this 2 songs ... they just make my day!!

Hints:
lyrics 2: the man voice is softer than the woman
lyrics 1: "combination" of "both"

DeAdLy CuRsE

2005-10-31T11:13:00.000+08:00

I'm really fed up with people who take advantage of other ppl blurness

From now on, any human being who take advantage of my sotong-ness to gain more money or to do bad things on me/others and the purpose is not for any good deeds,

1) shall lose all the money (should bankrupt) that he/she gained from me,
2) shall encountered double/triple same bad things that he/she caused me

And, i shall forget all this bad things and lead happy life (as always) as i don't wish to remember the bad things that happen to me and that it may caused a change of attitude in myself coz i still believe that Happy shall always go Lucky-mah :D

where is the law??

2005-10-30T02:29:00.000+08:00

The accident last Thursday night...nearby my place...we are at the main road, signaling to turn right. Once we turn, a motorbike, out of no where, appeared and bang to our car (the left-behind side door). The motorist wasn't wearing a helmet, didn't on its light, he's indian, it's night, and he doesn't has a license (we all assume coz he can't show his license when we asked).

He is VERY OK even after bang to our car and caused the tyre on the left-behind "disfigured" a bit, door "kemek", and the car shaft (i think that is what they call it) has to be replaced. We all thought we can settle it without reporting to police. We actually managed to asked him to sign a letter (written by a 3rd party and stating there're witnesses & the indian guy ic) that he'll bear with all the liability. We did asked him to pay some amount (rm200) there on the spot, yet, he can't come out with anything. GOSH ... so many ppl around there (uncles and youngsters) yet none of us can think properly!! He has relative staying nearby, he was with his cousins during that moment..how come we didn't thought of asking them to gather the money at the moment!!!Neither do we thought of reporting to police because some 3rd party told us that we will get "saman" from police as it's our fault and the police won't see it as the indian guy fault. And, to claim insurance, CAN'T also.

ALL BECAUSE OF TRUST and HUMANITY. We thought we shld let him rest because he was hurt too (NOT THAT SERIOUS..after we really thought of the whole accident). We thought he really can repair our car since he said he has friends in a workshop at segamat. STUPID ... all are bullshit. After one whole week, he has done nothing that he has promised. My friend has to find a foreman nearby my place to repair his car coz his car can't go anywhere farther. Coincidently, this foreman's wife car was knocked by the same indian guy last time!! And, seems that this indian guy has a bad reputation of banging ppl's car.

The indian guy kept on asking my friend to go over the nearby mamak to "sembang"... my friend has been there twice ... only to listen to bullshit. Yday (SAT), my friend called him again, asking him whether he "at least" managed to get the door. My friend no longer can wait because the car has been repaired and only left the door..The indian guy said that he has the door but can't find ways to send the door to the workshop. ALAMAK ... his place is just nearby the workshop...what so hard to do it??? We already not asking him to pay the whole amount of the repair!!! and yet, he can't do a little thing. The indian guy divert my friend to call the indian guy's bro, saying that his bro has the door. To my friend despair, they don't have the door at all!!!!

My friend can't trust this indian guy anymore. LIE AFTER ANOTHER LIE. My friend paid for the repair. Drive the car all the way to Jln Bandar to report. GOSH...need to queue to see the police that will report the whole case (when there aren't many ppl around!!!). IT WAS A BAD and AWFUL experience. My friend thought that the law is to help victim. NOPE! After explaining what happen to the policeman, he straight away said it's my friend fault. Because, the motorbike is going straight. Policeman said, according to law, my friend is wrong. My friend told him that we have the letter stating that the indian guy admit is his fault. The policeman rudely asked my friend, "Who are you to asked IC from the indian guy??!!!". kns ... why is this policeman so rude!!!! He even told my friend that we might simply write a letter and sign there. My friend told him that we have witnesses too. He just told my friend that, all witnesses thing are for the law court only. He said my friend can sue the indian guy in court. KNS .. my friend just want him to write a bad record of that indian guy.

The policeman even asked my friend to ask some chinese guy (there were a bunch of chinese guy who are loitering at the police station compound to get customer... they are the ppl with the truck..dunno how to call them..hope u guyz understand who are they). The chinese guy even said it's my friend fault. Now, the police ask my friend to ask another chinese guy just to make my friend realised it's his fault. My friend told the policeman that he knows it's his fault. But, he further explained that how can a normal human being can see the indian guy with no helmet and no light motorbike in the middle of the road?? The policeman rudely told my friend, his responsibility is to report accident. The indian guy's fault, will have to report to the traffic police such that the traffic police will take action. My friend asked, "Shouldn't the law protect the victim? Why is the law now making the indian guy as the victim when i'm the actual victim??". The policeman straight away give my friend a "saman" for 1st) reporting it late, 2nd) for causing the accident.

After that "saman" the 2nd chinese guy told my friend that he shouldn't continue say any words coz the policeman about to tell him how to settle (he meant RASUAH). KNS to that chinese guy ... he also needs my friend to give him some "duit kopi" to help my friend settle the whole thing. Else, he would have inform my friend earlier on. Even the 1st chinese guy also wanted the "duit kopi" only. They, the CHINESE, not being helpful either. They will only help if they see $$$. Not only that, they even condemn my friend's action in front of my friend!!! My friend heard one of them saying that my friend has alot of money to take this stupid action. Don't they supposed to help us instead of wanting our $$$ and say harsh words???

This incident created a HUGE impact to my friend. My friend never thought that the law will not side him. My friend never thought that even CHINESE also not helping us and only want $$$. My friend never thought the policeman never show "peri kemanusian". My friend never thought he as the victim has the ending of a wrongful person i.e receive the "saman", pay for his car repair and can't do anything towards the indian guy.

I'm about to say something bad here.
I really wish the god will open his eyes and punish the ppl who has caused my friend to lose his belief, confident and faith. I really hope i have the $$$ .. hire some killer!!!

I know my friend will never change into someone who knows how to play "tricks" or talk in tricky way to the police (i'm saying ... something like a gangster behaviour) coz he has this good man face and kind heart (in other words ... too straight). Thus, all i can advised him is to take this bad experience as a motivation for him to better in his business and earned more. More $$ as in can sue those wrongful ppl in court instead of paying "duit kopi".

RM600 for the "saman". RM688 for the car repair (and the door hasn't been repaired). RM5-10 for making phone calls to indian guy, to indian guy's bro, to some 3rd party ppl who claims they know the law (yet also want "duit kopi" only). RM50-60 for the petrol money of coming to my place from his place thrice, to & fro Jln Bandar, driving around to have a peace of mind after Jln Bandar incident. RM20-30 for paying the drinks & snacks at some place with singers playing mellow songs, also to relax..... all this is nothing compare to all the despair, anger, tears.

New leaf replacing Old leaf

2005-10-28T15:21:00.000+08:00

sigh ... my MD is leaving (early retirement-wor) ... this month will be his last month ... sigh sigh ... new MD coming in soon (wonder when .. coz, i have a feeling he's not going to show up at all...maybe he will never know who are his subordinates too).

I wrote this in his farewell card,

Bpk,
You may have a fierce voice and face yet deep inside, you're a friendly person. Thanks for giving me a chance to join sales and returned to Msia (instead of becoming a PR in JKT :P). All the best ...

I remembered last time when i was in JKT, i was quite shocked that my MD knows my name!!! (ok, probably because my company less ppl and it's easier to remember name of those in oversea project) and he can joke around ...

gosh ... i don't really have any nice thing to talk bout my new MD. Probably i have met some good bosses that leave good impression. At least they acknowledge your existence in a project/company. And can talk/chat/joke as a friend instead of the superior-subordinate relationship. Heard from some of my seniors, my MD sometimes will ask about their children's well-being, their health, etc.

SG is a "FINE" place

2005-09-18T23:43:00.000+08:00

just came back from JB and SG trip ... "FINE" as in that there are all sort of fines in sg which is why the whole country is in "control-able" state (an information from my dad actually) ... drinking at the MRT station (the place where we buy tickets) will fines us sg$500!!!!

BUT, i must say, i'm very amazed with sg ... the whole country is so systematic and well-planned (the transportation, township, housing, etc) .. and, the ppl really abide by the rules ... and ... first thing i noticed when i reach there is that ... Chu Kang is a famous road's name :D ... there are Chua Chu Kang, Lim Chu Kang and ...there's another chu kang which i forgotten the full road name liow ...
2nd, is that the drivers really follow the speed limit!!! (back in msia ... we'll only drive according to the speed limit if there's a camera or a policeman around .. hhehhe) ...
3rd-ly, the pedestrians can walk safely coz the cars will actaully stop/slow down for pedestrians. My bf and i was following this lady from the point we reach Sg (asking her to show us to MRT) ... she just walk and does not really have to look left and right .. she just look straight at the traffic light for the sign if we can cross or not. THere's a car wanted to turn left to the road that we are crosing ... i thot she'll stop, but, no .. she didn't even noticed that car!!! she just walk and we both just followed.
4th, the ladies loves to flaunt their "above"body part as much as possible ... i mean, wearing low LOW necklines shirt ... even pregnant lady too!!!!!! and, this morning, in the mrt, saw this lady wearing a shirt that is showing her cleavage (to me ... it's quite low), and she's sitting ... wondering if those standing will keep looking at it :D
5th, MOSTLY chinese and they speak mandarin ... hmmm .. even those that are doing eatery business also speak mandarin to customer who is fair skin ... first nite tehre, we went to a steamboat restaurant ... hmmm .. i like the corn with pork soup but doens't like the tomyam coz tak ada tomyam taste that makes me feel "UMPH" :D ... the waiter started explaining something in mandarin liow ... 4 of us (who is english educated) looking at my bf for a translation. 2nd day, we went to a chinese retaurant that sells something like dimsum, "lai min" (the chef uses his hand to made this ... not sure how to say in it english) ... the mee is not as good as the one i tasted before in Jkt's Crystal Jade (at P.Indonesia). The receipt is in chinese!!! Hmmm .. what if the customers are foreigner-leh???
6th ... they have this amazing place where ppl can relax there (east coast) ... they can roller blade, cycle, jog, walk, swim, and they provide bbq area for them too ... not one/10 ... there are more than 50!!! and not small space either ... it's like a round area, tehre are place to sit and place to put things and place to bbq too ... However, i think we have stopped at the wrong place (not really wrong .. we didn't want to be at that place .. and didn't know that the bus can stops further up) thus we have to walk more than 20min to reach the eatery outlet area. Wahlau, bypassing all those BBQ area, i'm getting hungry!!! and, the sight seeing of those good looking men and women exercising!!! heheehhe ... i'm in kl and seldom goto any tasik place (probably not more than 5 times in my entire life)

anyhow ... things are too expensive for me liow ... my money mostly spent on foods. And, first day tehre, i was having a dirty tissue on my hand, wanted to throw it but can't find a dustbin .. my bf asked my to simply throw it to test how effective is their law :D :)) (nah .. din't throw it there-lah) ... and, on the way to spore custom (goin back to JB), saw this road sign stating that all sg's car oil tank must have at least 3/4 portion in it before leaving to JB ... heheheh, my bf said probably to avoid them from filling full tank at jb. Can't find any special foods to buy for my family ... YET, i stil love to be in msia ... at least i have a car to move around anywhere ...

JB ... sigh ... looks dirty-leh (at certain roads-lah) ... and, the taxi driver keep charging us extra rm1-rm2 for nothing .. and we questioned them, yet .. hmmm .. forgotten their answers liow ... but, we are not over-loaded nor do we have luggage at the back. And, there's a taxi driver wanted to charge us rm10 per person for taking us from the taxi stand (it's a different taxi stand from the one we know and it was quite isolated too) to City Square when he saw us like clueless of our location. Thank god, the taxi driver who fetch us from sg "came to rescue"(well, we actually ask him ... heheh). He told us that is just around 5-7 min walking distance.And, at nite, there are alot of policeman on the road walking around. ALOT than in KL...give me the unsafe feeling to wander around in the area. And, everyone has a different version on how to get to spore from jb .. and those are local ppl too ... anyhow, things finally worked out and we managed to get there.

And ... their so-called duty free shop .. KNS-lah ... ok-lah .. mayb my bf and i dunno much bout the dutyfree shop concept ... but, wouldn't it be helpful that at the entrance or the shop outlet shows a signboard informing us items that are taxable and non-taxable items??? NOTHING-loh (probably we both too busy looking for liqour and chocolate outlet :D ) ... at the exit ... the customs are there to check us ... and there's a HUGE signboard stating the taxable items ... kns ... charge us rm30 for the stupid liqour which at first we thought is cheap. Thank god i didn't continue to persuade my bf to buy the beer carton .. else, mau "spit busuk saliva" liow!!! FEEL CHEATED!!!!!!

Bought some Ping Pei's mooncake that is the JB local brand. Not bad coz we can't find it in KL and small size and the skin is not like KL's that felt starchy.

2005-09-08T18:49:00.000+08:00

Cool-leh ... heheheh ...

story of jar, golf balls, pebbles, sands and COFFEE

2005-09-08T14:15:00.000+08:00

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hoursin a day are not enough, remember this story.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items infront of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a verylarge and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areasbetween the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar wasfull. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with aunanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed."Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are theimportant things - God, family, children, health, friends, and favoritepassions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If youspend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play With your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. "Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

"One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show youthat no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

happy to get a saman??

2005-08-30T10:19:00.000+08:00

i was having breakfast with my bf at Section 17 ... parked my car in the yellow box but didn't pay for the ticket (seldom do so, yet never receive a saman) ... however, just now, saw a saman on my car ... .... start cursing at first ... then, start laughing ... WHY???? well ... seems that the person who issued it has some problem with his eye sights ... he sees my V as a J ... HAHHAHAHAH .... then ... read at the back of the saman ... stated there that if you parked your car without displaying any ticket, fined RM100 ... but, with a ticket (even if its date has expired), fined rm30 ONLY!!! so ... conclusion ... ALWAYS, display the old ticket in ur car ... just leave it there (in case u forgotten to pay a new car park ticket)

i guess i don't need to pay for this compound :))

life is like "a PIECE of cake"

2005-07-28T00:07:00.000+08:00

Just wanna share this story.

Somehow, it did helped me to "woosah woosah" & to think of the bright side of "feeling lost" situation that i'm facing now.

Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation!

A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

"Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers.

"Yuck" says her daughter.

"How about a couple raw eggs?"

"Gross, Mom!"

"Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?"

"Mom, those are all yucky!"

To which the mother replies:
"Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake! God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful! God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

girlfriends

2005-07-26T22:48:00.000+08:00

One of my gf send this to me ... i find it very meaningful which is why i feel so lucky to have some close gfs with me. heheheh .. though seldom keep in touch and worst, i forgot to wish them on their birthday!!!! there's still a sense of closeness there. :P

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned to her daughter in a clear, sober voice.

"Don't forget your girlfriends," she advised, swirling the tea-leaves to the bottom of her glass.

"They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you'll have, you are still going to need girlfriends. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them. And remember that 'girlfriends' are not only your friends - but your sisters, your daughters, your daughter-in-laws and other female relatives too. You'll need other women. Women always do."

"What a funny piece of advice," the young woman thought.

"Didn't I just get married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake, a grown-up, not a young girl who needs girlfriends! Surely my husband and the family we'll start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!"

But she listened to her mother; she kept contact with her girlfriends and befriended more each year.As the years rolled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her mum really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, girlfriends are the mainstays of her Life.

After 52 years of living in this world, here is what I've learned:

Time passes

Life happens

Distance separates

Children grow up

Love waxes and wanes

Hearts break

Careers end

Jobs come and go

Parents die

Colleagues forget favours

Men don't call when they say they will

BUT girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girlfriend is never further away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley - and you have to walk it for yourself - your girlfriends will be on the valley's edge, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out. Our daughters, daughter-in-laws, sisters, mothers, sisters-in-laws, mothers-in-law, aunties, nieces, cousins, extended family and friends bless our lives! The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would we. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other. Every day, we need each other still.

Comment to the Monkey Story

2005-07-23T04:00:00.000+08:00

After reading http://hongfee.blogspot.com/ 's Traditional Habit - A Monkey Story .... i think i will be like the other new monkey that will not attempt to get the bananas but will ask the reason-lah (but then, if there're no more old monkeys around to pass down the reason, where can i get the reason-leh :P )

Just like my first experience in Jkt / some new place ... i will definitely listen to the advice passed down by my seniors. Partly also due to the fact that i'm not the "brave" type and thus, anything tends to scare me easily. But then, the are the "Seniors". In other words, they do have more experience than me and buat apa i question them on the advice??

Back to the above monkey story ... i think my bf's thought is totally different ... he will actually think that the monkey shld find the way to get out from the cage such that there's a higher chance to get other bananas ... hehhehehe

WoW

2005-07-23T02:42:00.000+08:00

War of the World (that was the above title) :P

Just watched it .... while watching it, was wondering how the story will ends as the earth is being attacked by alien!!! Watched it yourself to find out the ending.

Next ... F4 (Fantastic 4 :P)

Care Bears

2005-07-19T10:05:00.000+08:00

This is my favourite cartoon .. i got this from a Philippine children magazine.

Nothing more to comment on this ...
Just need to upload some picture coz i haven't upload any pictures for a very long time ...
:P